Queen Honored With Rare Jubbly Mayonnaise

Salad Queen is the toast of the town

Collage: Getty Images / WPA Pool / Pool // Heinz UK
THE CREAM OF ENGLAND
Royals

The Queen’s got a lot to celebrate in her 70-year reign. Taking the reins at the tender age of 25, completing a state visit to the Republic of Ireland, becoming a beauty mogul, and donating $13 million of her own money to charity are just a few of her accomplishments. But her most exciting honor — besides the known bridge and tunnel luvver recently getting that tunnel named after her — hits supermarket shelves this week: Salad Queen.

And oh, what a creamy distinction it is!

According to Sky News, Heinz is releasing a play on the British condiment Salad Cream, dubbed “Salad Queen” (although the fervent ass-eaters among us got to the term before Heinz did), to pay tribute to Lilibet’s extraordinary emulsive reign.

To this Yank, salad cream seems to be a bit like a globby aioli that a Brit may deposit over an anemic iceberg and tomatoes. Before Heinz started bottling the stuff in 1914, Victorian orphans would make it for themselves and their roving gang of tattered tuffs by pureeing hard-boiled eggs with cream, mustard, salt, and vinegar.

Heinz UK will also release HM Sauce, a “Her Maj” re-labeling of HP Sauce, a brown sauce that’s probably quite good on a salad of suet, raisins, and turkey liver paté.

A rep for Heinz said, “This is an extraordinary moment for the Queen and the great British public, and we want to celebrate this with two of our most well-loved and historic sauces. Releasing limited-edition bottles in time for the Jubilee felt like the perfect fit. We hope our customers enjoy these celebratory designs and that they add a squeeze of fun to the Jubilee celebrations, however one is celebrating.”

Sauce save the squeeze!