Outlaws Harry and Meghan Arrive at Granny's "Last Chance Saloon"

And the Queen's mad enough to swallow a horn toad backwards.

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new hat opportunity

Yeehaw! A royal expert named Duncan Larcombe told Closer via the Sun that American prospector Harry Wales and his scrappy little lady Calamity Meghan are in the “last chance saloon” with the royal family.

If these yellowbellies leak ANYTHING to the U.S. press about what they saw at the Jubbly, they are going to have to find an ace in the hole to hide out in.

"They have come to the UK and to the Jubilee and really cemented themselves as royals again, which is great for their brand and something that Spotify, Netflix and Penguin will be eating up,” Larcombe said, referring to the millions of dollars worth of deals they’ve amassed in the last few years, most if not all of which have yet to come to fruition. Even without those clams, for now they’ve got enough to pack up their mules, get the hell out of dodge, and find a nice little place out West, even farther West than Tyler Perry’s cliffside home in Montecito, a new, secluded enough spot where even trouble can’t find ‘em. It ain’t much, but it’s home.

The Markles have got a bit of good will now, ​but, Larcombe said the glamorous outlaws would “ruin that if any private information about this weekend was spoken about to the press or revealed in a book…If anything from the weekend leaked, I imagine they will be totally cut off and that’ll be it.”

If the Notorious Markle Bros’ shadow Firm-funding absquatulating for good, they could be in dire straits. Little Miss Meghan might have to give up her unpaid good will slingin’ for pantomime in a talkie or a cable legal procedural again, and Harry would have no choice but to follow her lead — he did basically nab a BAFTA for his work in The Last Jedi. Or will there ever be another season of Westworld? The little doll Lilibet could play an adorable robot baby from the Unclaimed Territories. That would show the royal family who the real stars are.

Well, I do smell gunpowder, don’t I? Or wait, maybe that’s burning wood. The Queen isn’t above bringing a stick to a knife fight (or a church, or a gala for 600 horses).