Fabulous Markle Twins Spotted Colluding at the Jubbly

They're in cahoots with the 21st-in-line

Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
coup there it is

Last night, the Queen sent an armored Land Rover to meet Harry, Meghan, Archie, and Lilibet Jr. at the London Gatwick baggage claim. It was a whole thing because, as you might remember, Harry and his bride famously left the UK over security issues (they didn’t have enough of it). The Cali cool quartet was then whisked away to their former home at Frogmore Cottage, never to be seen or heard from again, until this morning.

Well, the Daily Mail’s got eyes on those Fabulous Markle Twins, the hardest non-working members of the royal family — and as far as extracting larger conclusions about international celebrity, the role of modern monarchy, and institutionalized hatred, the implications are dire. America’s sweethearts are at the Jubbly, though not on the balcony, and have allegedly been “goofing around” with the children of some… lesser royals.

I can only link to the photoset due to corporate copyright guidelines/reasons of international security for my American brethren, but trust me when I say this much (the Mail said it, so I don’t have to):

The mother-of-two was spotted entertaining Peter Phillips' daughters Savannah, 11, and Isla, 10, and Mike and Zara Tindall's girls Mia, eight, and Lena, three, as they grew bored of watching the military display.
Meghan pouted, gasped and beamed as she put on an animated display in the window, with Princess Beatrice's husband Edoardo Mapelli Mozzi watching from behind. At one point the Duchess put a finger to her mouth to 'shush' cheeky Mia Tindall, who was on typically boisterous behaviour.

What are these obstreperous girlie girls colluding about with Marble? Let me put it this way. Savannah is 19th in line for the crown, Isla is 20th, Mia is 22nd, and Lena is 23rd. The Queen’s days are numbered. Prince Louis has already been naughty today, crying on the balcony. And if Meghan anything, it is fame hungry.

Just something to keep in mind as you tuck into your shepherd’s pie. Harry, for one, seems to be keeping it low key. Maybe he’s in the bathroom, checking the Los Padres score on his phone.