Meghan and Harry Iced Out of Jubbly

No free lunch for them

LONDON, ENGLAND - JUNE 03: Meghan, Duchess of Sussex and Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex attend the Nat...
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no kiss from charles
Royals

As you may well know, the Fabulous Markle Twins and their twin Markle children, Archie, 3, and Lilibet, 1, made their way to Gran’s blowout 96th bash this weekend. Apparently, the Sussexes brought the kids as a “good ice-breaker” when confronting the rest of the royal family for the first time since Megxit and the resulting Oprah interview that threatened to take down the firm. But these two should know better by now — to borrow Real Housewife Erika Jayne’s maxim, that’s not ice, it’s diamonds… and the crown jools will never thaw.

Far from being greeted like hometown heroes, Harry and Meghan were, to quote the Daily Beast, “enduring an ice-cold platinum jubilee” as festivities kicked off:

Over the course of the Jubilee celebrations so far, the palace couldn’t have made it clearer via several mime shows that it has little interest in trying to flatter the egos of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle—nor any inclination to use the political capital of the queen’s last hurrah to sell a narrative of reconciliation between Harry and his brother Prince William, or their wives.

And mounting evidence does seem to suggest that America’s most famous sweethearts were treated as distant guests at the British Jub.

CHARLES LOOKED ELSEWHERE

According to People, “Meghan Markle and Prince Harry didn’t publicly cross paths with senior royals at Jubilee celebrations.” When Prince Charles, Harry’s father, passed by the row that Harry and Meghan were sitting in with Princesses Eugenie and Beatrice at the Queen’s Thanksgiving ceremony, the almost-king was photographed “looking away” from them, although he clearly found the range of motion to blow Kate Middleton a kiss at some point.

NO FREE LUNCH… TWICE

People also reported that Harry and Meghan were not privy to the Lord Mayor’s reception at The Guildhall after the church ceremony, “nor a small family lunch following the Trooping parade on Thursday.”

MASSIVE BOOING, DEPENDING ON HOW GENEROUSLY YOU INTERPRET LOUD NOISES

While others have called reports of H&M-targeted booing greatly exaggerated, I must concede that audio evidence of the spectators’ hooting and hollering really does sound like booing to me, and I like these two much more than Prince Charles does.

THE QUEEN’S GRANDSON-IN-LAW MIKE TINDALL CHOSE SIDES

Lilibet Jr.’s first birthday took place on Saturday at Frogmore Cottage, where “the energy was lowkey,” according to Celebitchy. Lilibet’s second cousins — the little girls with whom Meghan was colluding just days prior — were invited, but probably didn’t attend. Why? “While Zara looked friendly with Harry and Meghan at the Jubbly service, Mike made a point of standing back, away from H&M. It’s been clear for two years now that Zara and Mike chose a side, and they chose William and Kate,” Celebitchy points out.

THEY HAD TO LEAVE EARLY

The Daily Mail reported that a “glum-looking Prince Harry” arrived back in California before the Jubbly grand finale even toot-tooted on Sunday. An insider told the publication, “There was no fanfare, they just went. They didn’t stick around for the Platinum Jubilee pageant which is a celebration of Britain and all of its quirks and eccentricities over the Queen’s 70 year reign.”

Were they forced out, and did Meghan’s makeup artist’s arty “goodbye London” Insta have anything to do with it? Seems like no and no, but… maybe!