If you're anything like us, you avoided taking advantage of any "New York City Cultural Events" this bright and sunny weekend. (Unless wandering around Economy Candy for munchies counts as a cultural event.) Specifically, we dodged the first two days of a certain week-long literary extravaganza, informally referred to as The PEN Festival of International Literature You Only Pretend to Have Read.

From this week's New York Press:

Our tab-y brother site, Sploid, alerts us to the fact that anti-porn evangelical, Andrea Dworkin, has died. Unlike other recently deceased luminaries, Dworkin probably doesn't have the same built-in retinue of designated mourners: frankly, outside of S.C.U.M. circles, there probably aren't many people who even remember Dworkin, much less intend to remember her fondly.

How much do writers love Harry G. Frankfurt and his book, On Bullshit? It must be so liberating for them to use the word "bullshit" all the time, they're practically bullshitting themselves.

Breathe easy, New York — Judith Regan will be heading to the West coast, leaving our high-ranking public servants safely married:

Unless you (a) live in a happy place, or (b) cannot be forced to read the Post, you're probably aware that Page Six reporter Paula Froelich has penned a bite-sized book entitled It! 9 Secrets of the Rich and Famous That Will Take You to the Top. (That 10th secret would've pushed wee Paula over the edge, we think.) As such, it's time for another round of Gawker's beloved book club, in which we open our selection to any page, at random, and choose a passage of interest or, preferably, absurdity. Now open your books to page 14:

In a review of Malcolm Gladwell's Blink and Elkhonon Goldberg's The Wisdom Paradox: How Your Mind Can Grow Stronger as Your Brain Grows Older in The New York Review of Books, Sue M. Halpern writes:

Readers of today's New York Times (people still read The New York Times, right?), will no doubt feel confused about what opinion they should espouse at their next dinner party. It basically boils down to this:

Because, as we earlier noted, it is your god-given right to pen a memoir, Erica Jong's daughter, Molly Jong-Fast, is releasing a collection of self-reflectionastic essays, The Sex Doctors In The Basement (unleashed tomorrow). Normally, we'd feign only mild interest in such a book, but we couldn't help but notice an interesting passage on page 166:

If you're like us, you're pushing 30, the largest readership you'll ever have is when you append messages to eVite RSVPs, you live in an apartment with the dimensions and charm of a bomb shelter, and the only way you'll ever get some attention from an agent is if you try to smuggle hash over the border.

The New York Observer's blog, The Politicker, has some excerpts from Rudy Giuliani's latest book, The Quotable Rudolph W. Giuliani. Unfortunately, it's not an authorized book, but rather a smear job by some right wingers who don't want the former mayor of Sodom-on-the-Hudson to run for president.

Gee, it's sort of hard to tell whose name and likeness is meant to sell Teany Book: A blend of stories, food, romance and of course tea.

In this special holiday preview of The Gotti Diet, we focus on a chapter written by Frank's mother, Victoria:

How's your memoir coming along? What? You're not writing a memoir? You must be living an extraordinarily boring life then. And besides, even if your life is about as exciting as the average blog or online coffee maker cam, you should still have a memoir. It's your god-given right, didn't you know?

· We have no idea if this is indeed Jonathan Safran Foer's blog — but if it is, do you think Deborah Solomon has it as her homepage? [The New Yorker]
· Hip, downtown parties: they're goth! No, they're coldwave! No, they're vampires! No, they're...so fucking over, now that they're in the Post. [NYP]
· Rosie O'Donnell loves America, too. [Once Adored]
· And finally, your daily dose of Pat O'Brien: "he used to refer to a gay African-American senior producer at 'Access Hollywood' as 'the Fruit Monkey.' To his face." Because the n-word is so last week, right? [Gatecrasher]

In today's edition of How Frank Gotti Lost All That Weight and Became a Teen Heartthrob, in which we pick a passage at random from the still unpublished The Gotti Diet, Frank reflects on his hot, new body:

When the weather gets nastier than Pat O'Brien in a S&M club, there's only one thing that can soften the mood, and it's a selection from The Gotti Diet. Today's taste of little Frankie:

We highly doubt the fellow traipsing about Amazon as Ethan Hawke is, in fact, Ethan Hawke. But judging from "his" review of Jonathan Safran Foer's Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, the jackanapes is doing some pitch-perfect work at the keyboard:

The goddamn liberal media strikes again! The "activist" board members of Simon & Schuster have seen fit to pull a little affirmative action and give Republican strategist Mary Matalin her own book imprint.

Your zygote's zygote is going to love this one.