Sweater Company Vows to Unstitch "Cuomosexual" on Lapsed Cuomosexuals’ Sweaters

Some free and also feminist ideas

purple sweater with "i dissent" stitching
Lingua Franca

Lingua Franca, a New York based company that sells $380 sweaters stitched with phrases such as “hate is a virus,” “in stacey abrams we trust,” and “pray for powder” (snow, we think, not cocaine), has announced on Instagram that any nasty type of woman who purchased a “cuomosexual” or “cuomo for president” sweatshirt can be restitched with the buyer’s phrase of choice.

The Lingua Franca social media team chose “believe survivors,” but that seems sort of mealy-mouthed to me after all I’ve learned for the very first time in the last 30 hours. All day, I’ve been grappling over what I’m going to do with my cuomosexual cashmere which is my favorite summer-weight sweater. Here’s my running list of ideas for my Lingua Franca redux. Are any of them feminism?

  • recovering cuomosexual
  • lapsed cuomosexual
  • homosexual
  • mario cuomosexual
  • cuomosexual conversion therapy works
  • cara kennedy-cuomosexual
  • romosexual holiday
  • alison romosexual
  • hochulsexual
  • i believe in harvey dent
  • i believe in women
  • alec baldwin does not believe women but he’s sort of hot to me still
  • women do not believe in aliens
  • i do not care if aliens exist
  • how much money do you have?
  • 380 dollars
  • affordable care act
  • pray for powder
  • pray for money
  • je suis charlie
  • direct-to-consumer coffin
  • believe consumers
  • disrupt big funeral
  • disrupt sexism
  • pat the state trooper’s stomach
  • don’t pat the state trooper’s stomach
  • cop horses are canceled too