James Franco Has the Same Physiognomy As Fidel Castro, As We All Know

Here’s an exercise: Close your two real eyes and try to picture in your mind’s fake eye, “Fidel Castro’s ancient Galician heraldry as [a] focal compass,” and then comb through the entire ranks of actors with Latin roots in Hollywood to find someone who has a similar facial structure.

Okay, open your eyes. Did we come up with the same person?

Yes, the answer is none other than disgraced actor/director/short fiction writer/adjunct James Franco. As shared with Deadline: “James, by far, had the closest facial likeness of our Industry’s leading actors, meaning that the focus would be to build out his character accent and we’d have a stunning on-screen match to intrigue audiences and bring the story to life with true visual integrity.” It’s true, I think everyone agrees that James Franco has the closest facial likeness to Fidel Castro of our industry’s leading actors, meaning that the focus would be to build out his character accent and we’d have a stunning on-screen match to intrigue audiences and bring the story to life with true visual integrity.

I took the words out of your mouth, I know, but these are actually the words of John Martinez O’Felan, the leading creative director of an upcoming movie called Alina of Cuba. Considering some audiences and movie studios may not be ready for Franco’s return to the screen after his alleged sex pest behavior with both students and minors alike, it makes sense that O’Felan and his team are naturally being preemptively defensive of the decision to cast Franco, although their current strategy appears to be focused not on the actor’s abilities or his alleged behavior, but on his physiognomy. Well, power to them, we all have to eat.

For what it’s worth, it doesn’t sound like Franco will be all that present in the film. Alina of Cuba is about Alina Fernandez, an illegitimate daughter Castro had with socialite Natalia Revueltra, who grew up to be one of Castro’s most outspoken critics. Got it. The Franco casting is really just a matter of necessity, as the director of the film instructed O’Felan and his team to find someone who holds the closest possible physical resemblance to the Cuban revolutionary, which, again, we all know is James Franco.