Yolanda Hadid's Myriad and Grievous Misdeeds

As revealed today, Vogue's April covergirl and Paris Fashion Week’s Best Dressed Bella Hadid got a rhinoplasty at the tender age of 14. She regrets it. “I wish I had kept the nose of my ancestors,” she said. “I think I would have grown into it.”

Your first question is probably, “What kind of parent allows their 14-year-old to get a nose job?” The answer is simple: it’s the chronic Lyme-suffering, lemon-drinking alleged Dutch slut herself, Yolanda Hadid. The former model’s actions against her own children (Bella, Gigi My Love and Anwar) is well-documented, literally, as she filmed Real Housewives of Beverly Hills while Bella and Gigi were in high school. While an underage nose job here and there might seem like nothing to write home about, the running tally of questionable things Yolanda has done and said on camera or in writing is far more alarming.

Here are a few of the hits:

• Telling Gigi that she thought Gigi was a lesbian because she played the “masculine” sport of volleyball, in which her teammates’ bodies were “big and bulky and they eat like men.”
• Chastising Gigi for eating half of a half of a half piece of cake at her birthday party during the same episode that Kyle confronts Carlton for putting a spell on her computer’s screensaver so it says words like “bigot” and “travesty”
• Whispering that Gigi’s eye makeup at a photoshoot is too “Chinese looking” for her taste. In a talking head afterward, Yolanda explained that she has instructed Gigi to always tell a makeup artist “to keep her eyes round and big so they pop, not the Chinese look, because that’s not good for her face.”
• Advising Gigi to eat a couple of almonds “and chew them really well” when Gigi tells her she feels really weak after eating half an almond
• Writing and possibly leaking this letter to Bella when she got a DUI at age 17 after picking her car up from being impounded. “You have literally turned into a spoiled, unthankful, unthoughtful careless human being that is lucky to be alive,” she wrote. “What an eye-opening experience to find beer cans, pink kittie [sic] bottle with vodka, bottles with Aderall [sic], Vyvanse, rolling papers, and a car full of dirty clothes, dirty underwear with blood stains, tampax [sic]. Yolanda also blames the mess in Bella’s car for ruining her younger brother’s life: “Life in my home has been changed forever. Poor Anwar his life is going to be miserable.” She was at least wrong about that one — Anwar went on to date Dua Lipa.