Tom Brady Renews His Vows (With Football)

We’ve gone through some rough patches but I love you more every day, baby

CHARLOTTE, NORTH CAROLINA - OCTOBER 23: Tom Brady #12 of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers fakes a handoff in...
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love tank

Vicki Gunvalson. Ramona Singer. Shannon Beador. Cynthia Bailey. Tom Brady?

After suffering another humiliating loss with the Buccaneers on Sunday, Tom Brady, the beleaguered football addict, has, like so many Real Housewives before him, publicly recommitted himself to a relationship that has clearly not been working for some time.

“I said last week that there’s no immediate retirement in my future,” Brady said during this week’s episode of his podcast. “There was a retirement in the past, but I’ve moved on from that … I made a commitment to this team, and I love this team and I love this organization.”

You might think that after having to apologize for saying on his podcast last week that playing football was like “going away on deployment for the military,” Brady would be more careful than to pronounce his love of and commitment to football while seemingly going through a divorce from his wife. And not only a divorce, but a divorce that was precipitated by his love of and commitment to football over his love of and commitment to their family. But, hey … that’s why we love our messy queen. :)

“I told them in March I was playing,” he said. “But I’ve never quit on anything in my life.” (This is excluding his marriage and family, of course, but he’s talking about, like, important things.)

Will Tom Brady and football suffer from the Housewives vow-renewal curse and get a divorce soon after publicly recommitting themselves to each other? If you ask me — of course. They’re not going to make it through this season, and you know football is going to end up with some hot, young thing right after they split. It’s sad, really. But at least Tom will have the support of his girlfriends.