Olivia Rodrigo's Fake Friend

She's a user, and she's plastic

Ulices Ramales / BACKGRID
like a damn sociopath

On a rare day off from her brutal touring schedule, pop-punk princess Olivia Rodrigo — the only Madonna-type figure (in both senses, for me) yet to emerge from the Disney+ series High School Musical: The Musical: The Series — stopped by the American Girl Place in Rockefeller Plaza. Presumably after a dishy lunch at New York’s best restaurant inside the premises, Rodrigo emerged with a new friend.

Ulices Ramales / BACKGRID

Aww? A return to innocence? Not so fast. This American Girl Doll already appears to be something of a user. Not only has she modeled herself in Rodrigo’s exact image, body language experts (me and my Korean Jindo Mars) have pointed out that this plaything is hanging with the pop star for all the wrong reasons. She’s addicted to the spotlight.

Ulices Ramales / BACKGRID

Iris Apatow, noted Rodrigo bestie, is shaking. The doll’s got the “good 4 u” crooner wrapped around her little finger and similarly miniature molded body.

She’s waving to the paps? Of course she is. And don’t even try to tell me that upskirt shot was accidental. This small-scale bitch with questionable morals knows what she’s doing.