Move over, Beau Biden (Baby): you’re very cute, but a new scion of industry has emerged from a famous birthing canal, and her name is Malibu Barbie Paytas-Hacmon. Bubu’s mama, the forever stunting YouTuber/podcaster Trish Paytas, tweeted the little doll’s arrival into the world with a few pictures of her wrapped up in muslin like Strawberry Shortcake.
I love her!
If you don’t know who Trisha Paytas is, Maybe check out Just Jared Jr. like a normal person, but I’ll do my best to explain. Trish (who uses the pronouns they/she) is primarily a YouTuber who still uses the very 2009 moniker “blndsundoll4mj” as their handle. They are constantly being canceled for any number of racist/idiotic offenses, but they always come back stronger. Trish is maybe most well-known these days as an ASMRer, which will help out at Little Baby Bu Barb’s bedtime, but you might know them from the time they said that their gender identity was that of a chicken nugget. Or the time they acted as a honeypot on an episode of Nathan For You.
Last week, days before Baby Barb was born, Trish had to clarify on TikTok that they did NOT yet have the baby, and that the baby would NOT be a reincarnation of Queen Elizabeth after a proliferation of memes claiming just that.
In any event, Malibu Barbie Paytas-Hacman is a perfect name. Not since Summer Moon Honey Davies was born to 2/7 of the cast of late era Vanderpump Rules has a name fit a set of parents so well. Like Barbie herself, Trish is a big old blonde doll with a lot of different careers, and young Malibu Barbie is their finest work.
BuBar is Trish’s first child with Moses Hacmon, the brother-in-law of their former podcast host Ethan Klein, with whom she has a famously tumultuous on-air/off-air relationship. Again, I don’t wish to bring discord to Malibearbear’s first days at Planet Trish’s dream house, so I can’t get into it all, other than to say that Klein is likely already a proud uncle/eventual frenemy to the magnanimous MBPH.
Now we end with a lullaby.