Lala Kent Keeps Changing Her Name — and You’ll Never Guess What Her Name Is Now

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NEW YORK, NEW YORK - OCTOBER 14: Lala Kent attends 'Legends Ball 2022 BravoCon' at Manhattan Center ...
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give them someone

“What's in a name? That which we call a rose, by any other word would smell as sweet.” That was a legit mind-blowing thing Juliet said once, and we’re literally still processing it. Vanderpump Rules star Lala Kent seems to get it though, because she just changed her name to a different name.

And then she changed it again.

As you may know, “Lala Kent” was never Lala Kent’s real name. Like John Roger Stephens, Margaret Mary Emily Anne Hyra, and Edda van Heemstra Hepburn-Ruston before her, Lala spruced up her name so it might look better displayed in Hollywood’s bright lights. “Lala comes out when a camera turns on and it still is me, but it’s almost this version where I can protect myself a bit — and it may just be in my head, but I don’t care — because I feel protected by Lala,” Kent wrote in her New York Times not best seller Give Them Lala. “She’s super bad ass.”

Indeed, and she’s suckin’ dick for a lot more than Range Rovers, honey, as we know. Instead of “Lala Kent,” the first iteration of Lala Kent’s name was: Lauren Elyse Burningham. After that it was, briefly: Lauryn Burningham. Then it was, briefly: Lauryn Kent. Then, before she started filming Vanderpump Rules, she settled on: Lala Kent. (She chose “Kent” because it was her dad’s first name.)

And now? Well, the eagle-eyed sleuths at Reddit noticed “Lala Kent” had updated her nom de célébrité on Instagram … and you’ll never guess to what. Please guess before I show you — PLEASE guess, this is not a fucking joke — and then scroll. She is now:

LAURYN KENT — AGAIN!

“It’ll be kind of impossible to go back to Lauren when all her brands and her podcast have the name Lala in them!,” said one commenter, I guess aptly, though also who cares. “What a stupid move from a brand standpoint, all her brands are named after lala,” said another commenter who is seemingly very concerned with consistency in the lipgloss saleswoman formerly known as Lala Kent’s branding.

Fret not, though, losers, because I have great news. Sometime between when she changed her name 12 days ago and now, she changed her name … AGAIN!

TO LALA KENT — AGAIN AGAIN!

How will we adjust to this new world wherein the woman we formerly knew as Lala Kent and then knew as Lauryn Kent is now Lala Kent again? It will be difficult. It will take time. But as apparently Theodore Roosevelt said, “Nothing in the world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty … I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life. I have envied a great many people who led difficult lives and led them well.” Amen, sister.

Good luck processing this change. And if it helps, try to remember that crazy shit Juliet said.