On this morning's Yo on E! show, DJs Graham Funke and Stone Rokk, frequent masters of record-spinning ceremonies at celebrity-infested local establishments like Area and Les Deux, are induced into talking some smack about the famous clientele to whom the clubs' buzz-craving owners slavishly cater in hopes of keeping their venues from falling out of favor with Hollywood's incredibly fickle starfucking crowd.
While trying to capture an image of Britney Spears following an apparent lip-collagen injection so over-the-top that it could make an aging Beverly Hills trophy wife faint dead away in horror, one of TMZ's fearless photographers bravely sacrificed a pristine tube sock in the commission of his noble duty.
Apparently failing once again to comply with the easy-to-follow custody guidelines the court helpfully laid out for her earlier this month, Britney Spears has had her visitation rights temporarily suspended. Additionally, Los Angeles Superior Court Commissioner Scott M. Gordon has decreed that Spears won't be able to see her children until she figures out why, "I dunno, I'll give one of the little brats to my hairdresser?" isn't an acceptable answer to the question of how she might resolve a conflict between Sean Preston and her other, still-unnamed offspring, a learning process that might take several session with a court-appointed parenting coach to complete. [CBS2.com]
Accompanied by the usual retinue of paparazzi photographers and local news crews that document her every frappuccino run, conspicuously public lunch date, and spur-of-the-moment shopping trip to the Neglected Baby Gap, embattled onetime popstar Britney Spears reported to the Van Nuys police station under the cover of darkness last night to be booked for her failure to leave a "Sorry, y'all, I'm bad at parking!" note on the car she struck in a Petco parking lot back in August. The routine processing unfolded without incident, according to a police spokesperson whose description of his experience with Spears recalls the vague pride of a pet owner whose Chihuahua successfully evacuated its bowels outside of the house for the first time:
PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so send them in often. Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line so we don't lose them) and tell everyone about the time you spotted Chyna Doll perusing the Burbank Target aisles.
As Britney Spears shakes off a walloping hangover after a night of toasting to her minor victory in family court yesterday—child visits one night a week, supervised by several 450-pound baby monitors plucked from the lower ranks of K-Fed's ever-growing security/poop-wiping detail—we thought we'd turn to topics more cheery than irreversibly-scarred toddlers: Britney's new album! Possibly one of the most anticipated records of this year or any other, In Rainbows Blackout is a welcome return to form, poised to catapult the preoccupied singer back up the charts with songs like "Get Naked (I Got A Plan)," "Hot As Ice," and "Why Should I Be Sad." As it turns out, the photo circulating yesterday of a windswept Spears biting seductively on a digit was in fact not the official album cover, which People exclusively unveiled today: a colorful collage of fedoras, wristbands, zebra prints, and vertigo-inducing spirals that's sure to put a spell on even the staunchest Britney detractor.
Having within the space of just a few weeks been stripped of her two children, a leather bustier, and yet another a pair of overly constricting panties, a vulnerable-like-never-before Britney Spears (whose new album drops Oct. 30—check out the fierce cover art!) made a rare appearance in court today, in the hopes of convincing Superior Court Commissioner Scott Gordon to reconsider allowing overnight visits with her sons:
Nothing starts your morning off better than a cold, hard look at Britney Spears's lady parts. Since Brit is currently fighting for the right to overnight visits with Sean Preston and Jayden James, we can only assume that this is her way of showing the judge that she's able to have some consistency and stability in her life when it comes to not wearing panties. Or possibly, it's to distract us from her hideous case of pink eye. That's right, it's being reported that the entire Spears clan (K-Fed and the kids too) have all got the dreaded eye infection conjunctivitis, which is caused by fecal matter getting in the eyeball. Good parenting all around, guys!
As a single venti Americano tossed at a swarm of paparazzi quickly escalated into the Great Britney Bel-Air Riots of 2007, the young woman at the center of the destruction continues to chug along with what remains of her career: Jive Records announced today that Spears's new album, "Blackout" (funny—we don't remember seeing that option on the shortlist), would be released two weeks ahead of schedule.
Had you told us that Sarah Jessica Parker not only has a signature perfume, but has one that racked up $57 million in sales, we'd chuckle lightly and explain how that was simply impossible, as no woman in her right mind would spend a red cent to smell like a well-heeled Manhattan dowager with a documented drinking problem. (Who can keep straight where actress begins and character ends after six seasons?) And yet, nestled in a Forbes slide show covering the bestselling celebrity fragrances of all time, is that astronomical sum—what Parker's Lovely earned in 2006 alone.
