December 26th to 30th Ranked from Least to Most Disorienting

The never-ending week

Illustration with hypnosis: black and white spiral and swinging watch

What happens between Christmas and New Years? I really could not tell you. Because of capitalism, it feels like the whole year is working toward December 25th, the peak of Q4, before everything resets in the new year. But there are actually five distinct days between Christmas and New Year’s Eve, even if they all run into each other.

Although all the post-Christmas days are all hazy, they are not equally so. Here they are ranked in order of least to most disorienting:

5. December 26

If you do find yourself wondering what day it is, it’s somewhat easier to be aware of December 26, because yesterday was Christmas, which you probably noticed because all the stores were closed on a Saturday.

4. December 29

This day feels like an accomplishment because you’ve exited the 20s, which almost feels like you’ve made it through the end of the month. But somehow there are still two days left.

3. December 28

One exciting thing about December 28, 2021 is that luck-bearing planet Jupiter makes its annual transition into a new sign. This year it’s Pisces, which is good news for us because Jupiter loves Pisces, and will hopefully make things a little bit sweeter for us all. If you are not into astrology, this day will have even less meaning to you, so maybe you should get into astrology.

2. December 27

Because the decorations are still up and your podcasts are still not releasing new episodes, you might wake up wondering if Christmas even happened at all. Yes, it was two days ago, and now it’s gone, which means you’re 363 days from the next one, which is a little melancholy.

1. December 30

When December 30 finally rolls around, I’m like, what the hell? How is there still more year left? And what is someone expected to do on December 30th and why must we continue to suffer in this broken ass timeline when the half-and-half is already dated for 2022?

It’s time for a new year. Maybe it will be better than the last one.