Thousands Beg Will and Jada Pinkett Smith: Enough

A week ago, my colleague Claire Carusillo was brave enough to voice one urgent, necessary, stoic plea: “Will Smith: Enough.” Now it appears thousands more have joined her in this request, as evidenced by a new Change.org petition bearing the straightforward, economical entreaty: “Stop interviewing Will and Jada smith !”

There is no explanation given in the description of the petition, aside from the enigmatic “Poor Will smith…” What could have prompted this, you may ask? Why must we stop interviewing the Smiths? What need are the 6,239+ signatories trying to express most stridently through this online appeal?

I’ll give you a guess, in the form of these recent headlines regarding Will:

Will Smith Opened Up About How He “Resorted” To Having “Rampant Sexual Intercourse” To Deal With Being Cheated On By His First Girlfriend Which Led To Him Developing A “Psychosomatic Reaction” To Having An Orgasm

Will Smith Said He Once Considered Killing His Father To Avenge His Mother After Years Of Violence And Thought He Could “Easily Get Away With It” Because He’s “One Of The Best Actors In The World"

Will Smith Revealed He Once "Pranked" Jada Pinkett Smith By Playing One Of Her Sex Scenes For His Religious Grandmother And Admitted That To This Day Jada "Hasn’t Chuckled Once" Over It

Will Smith tripped 14 times on ayahuasca with ‘Mother’ and went to tantric sex expert after splitting with Jada

Will Smith says he borrowed $10,000 from a drug dealer after he went broke from not paying taxes

WILL SMITH REVEALS HE FELL IN LOVE WITH STOCKARD CHANNING DURING THE FILMING OF ‘SIX DEGREES OF SEPARATION’

Will Smith says his mom accidentally caught him and his then-girlfriend 'deep in throes of reckless lovemaking' when he was a teenager

Jada’s been a little quieter lately, but don’t worry, she’s had her turn publicly airing the intimate details of her personal life, too.

On the one hand, perhaps the Smiths should be lauded for practicing what some might call radical candor (a nicer term for “oversharing”). But some onlookers have clearly had enough. Reasons for signing the petition thus far include such statements as “everything i learn about this couple is against my will” and “not everything has to be public knowledge <3”

Between the Smiths and their complicated relationship, their hostage audience, and the courageous bloggers whose job it is to tirelessly write up each and every one of the couple’s confessionals in excruciating detail, it’s hard to say with certainty which party is suffering the most right now. There’s only one possible solution: Let’s take it to the Red Table.