Who Should Replace Trevor Noah on 'The Daily Show'?

We do not wish this job on anyone, but here are some ideas

CHICAGO, IL - OCTOBER 16:  Trevor Noah on The Daily Show Undesked Chicago 2017: Lets Do This Before ...
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After seven years, Trevor Noah is leaving the Daily Show. America’s third most-famous South African émigré (following Charlize Theron and Elon Musk) announced his upcoming departure on last night’s episode of the show, saying, “We’ve laughed together, we’ve cried together… But after seven years, I feel like it’s time.” I do not remember crying with Noah, but I’ll let him have this one.

Noah got the short end of the Daily Show stick when he took over from Jon Stewart in 2015, having to preside over the show during the Trump presidency. I don’t know if you’ve heard, but satire died somewhere around 2016, leaving Noah with a show that never felt capable of handling whatever was going on.

But now he’s free — or will be when they figure out his actual departure date — and will have plenty of time to pursue his true passion: dating beautiful brunette women. The question is, who will replace him?

Roy Wood Jr.

If you have laughed at a Daily Show segment in the last seven years, it probably involved Wood. He’s funny, capable, and people like him. What more could you want? The only thing working against him is that he’s been working at the Daily Show for just as long as Noah. If history teaches us anything, it’s that the correspondents who have been putting in the work alongside the departing host for years and years do not get the job, and it’ll go to some rando who showed up a year ago.

Any Woman

She doesn’t even have to be famous, although that would probably help. Plus, seeing as the show has at most two years left in it, this would be a win-win for the geniuses over at Comedy Central in charge of things like the Crank Yankers reboot. They can revel in the positive press of hiring a woman and then also blame her for the show’s eventual inevitable demise.

Martin Short

Go big or go home, fellas. If you’ve seen Short do a public appearance in the last few years, you know that he always comes prepped with at least five minutes of his own timely political humor. This gig would also give him the venue to do what he loves most in this world, which is talk. He could even do the interview portion of the show as Jiminy Glick (perhaps minus the fat suit). “But isn’t he old?” So is this damn show, and at least Short is funny.

No One

It really is not fair to give anyone this show. They will always be compared to Jon Stewart, and they will never live up to what he was able to do during the Bush era. Signing up for this job is like signing up to push a rock up a hill, except everyone is always telling you that another guy did it way better than you ever will.

Jon Stewart

Just let him come back. Lord knows his Apple TV+ show is not gripping the nation.