Jennifer Aniston Says She Wants to Date a Normal Guy

I've provided some options for her to consider

BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA - JANUARY 05: Jennifer Aniston attends the 77th Annual Golden Globe Awards...
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Matchmaking

Jennifer Aniston is still open to love, especially if it arrives in the form of someone who is not famous. The actress and single-chip-eater told People (The TV Show!) — yes that’s what it’s called — that she’s hoping to find a partner who isn’t a megawatt A-lister. When asked if she believes those kinds of relationships can work, the Morning Show star said, “Absolutely. I mean, it’s happened. That’s what I’m sort of hoping for is not necessarily somebody in the industry itself. That’d be nice.”

That would be nice, Jen. I believe in your ability to date someone whose name makes me go, “Who is that?” Many successful women before you have done it. There’s something that must be appealing about getting to be incredibly famous and coming home to someone who doesn’t have a publicist on retainer. That’s the whole plot of Notting Hill.

But the question is: Who should Jen date? I fancy myself a bit of a Patti Stanger, so I feel qualified to present some options.

A Behind-the-Scenes Movie Guy

When it comes to someone who works behind the camera, the further down the credits the better. Think Julia Roberts’s camera operator husband Danny Moder. A guy like this will understand a grueling shooting schedule, and will probably have one of his own to attend to. Jen probably wants someone with whom she can talk shit about her coworkers at home, and if her partner works in the industry, it’s more likely that he’ll know what she’s talking about.

Some Random Scientist/Doctor

Earlier this year, Jen told InStyle that she’s been enjoying getting to know “doctors and scientists” especially “given what we've been living through.” Imagine the peace of mind she could feel if she were legally wed to a biochemist. Plus, he’d probably be a genius, which would be the ultimate party trick at a swanky Beverly Hills dinner party otherwise full of absolute idiots.

My Dad

If Jen is really looking for someone who is “not necessarily in the industry,” you can’t get any better than my dad. He works in politics (the show business of the D.C. area), is a very good cook, and is six feet tall. Kind of a catch if you ask me.

Let me know if any of these options sound good, Jen. I can make any of them happen for a very competitive price, but what does money matter when we’re dealing in love?