Jennifer Aniston and David Schwimmer: Just Friends

Media literacy class is in session

PASADENA,CA - JANUARY 7:   Actress Jennifer Aniston and actor David Schwimmer attend the 27th Annual...
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Sorry to be a huge buzzkill, but I’m pretty certain Jennifer Aniston and David Schwimmer are not dating. If you saw that rumor on your Twitter feed and your little heart did a pitter-patter, flooding your brain with all the Ross and Rachel moments that made you believe love is real, I need to teach you a lesson in celebrity media literacy.

The first place to report that Javid (Dennifer?) were dating was Closer, a lower tier British gossip publication. And that’s the first red flag; if the alleged source had a real scoop, they would leak it to a more reputable U.S. source, like Us Weekly or People, or even TMZ. Schwimmer himself went to Page Six to deny the rumor.

Even though we have heard it from the horse’s mouth, let’s examine why we never should have believed this in the first place. Closer’s source claims that this relationship was ignited after the Friends reunion, where Schwimmer admitted that they were “crushing hard” on each other. “They began texting immediately after filming and, just last month, David flew from his home in New York to see Jen in LA,” the source said.

The source goes on to claim that the two have been hanging out at Aniston’s house, drinking wine, and being “deep in conversation.” The person who would know this would have to be close to either Schwimmer or Aniston, and again, they would go to a more legitimate publication if they really wanted to leak this information.

Celebrity gossip is a currency, and it’s widely known that this kind of story can be traded to a tabloid in exchange for a lot of things: coverage for yourself, coverage for a client, or the withholding of less-than- flattering information about yourself/a client. A reputable source would have known what to do with this scoop, and it isn’t taking it to a British tab that isn’t even the Daily Mail.

And consider how this information was disseminated: a viral tweet from the clothing brand PrettyLittleThing. If you are getting your celebrity gossip from an account that also peddles flammable-looking clothing designed for blacking out in Miami, I cannot help you. Although there is a really good scooplet from someone in the replies about serving the duo a “pea omelette” at some unknown time in the past.

Lastly, ask yourself: Did you really think this was true? Or do you watch Friends every night to fall asleep and have become attached to a sitcom that initially aired over 20 years ago in a way that could be described as “unhealthy?” It’s okay. This is a safe space to admit to our shortcomings. A lack of media literacy is one of the biggest issues plaguing people on the internet, and we all get duped occasionally. Usually not for something as obviously fake as this, but I am here to help—not judge—all you dummies.