Gwyneth Paltrow: “I Have Now Learned That ‘Snatched’ Means I am Killin It (?).”
All it took was a present from Kim Kardashian
This morning, as I was sipping my cold brew, a headline caught my eye. “Gwyneth Paltrow Just Learned What ‘Snatched’ Means — All Thanks to Kim Kardashian,” it read. It was from E! Online, and the subhead promised “a hilarious journey” as Paltrow “navigated the world of SKIMS and discovered a new term.” Obviously, I was hooked.
The article directed me to Paltrow’s Instagram story from Wednesday night, in which Paltrow receives a publicity package from Kardashian’s shapewear company Skims. The first frame shows the fuschia box, embossed with both the Skims logo and the Fendi logo. It is simply captioned, “A box.”
The next two videos show Paltrow’s hands opening the box, which has more boxes inside of it, and telling her assistant, “Stop, stop.” Not in the colloquial “Oh my god, stoppppp,” way but in a “Cut the cameras, deadass,” way. The “hilarious” nature of this “journey” is yet to be seen.
But the next video we see is Paltrow holding a nude bodysuit, asking, “What is that?” Now I’m laughing. Has she never seen a bodysuit before? “This is so you can get nice and snatched,” the assistant replies. “What is snatched,” Paltrow asks incredulously. “I’m trying to learn the lingo,” the caption reads.
After looking at some of the bras, Paltrow holds a different bodysuit up to her torso, and poses as if she’s wearing it. She purses her lips and puts her hand on her hip, as her assistant asks, “Do you feel snatched?” Answering a question with a question, Paltrow asks, “Is this gonna make me snatched?”
“Yeah, 100 percent, it’s gonna snatch the house down,” her assistant says. Paltrow laughs. It’s unclear whether or not she has actually learned what “snatched” means, but the caption reads, “I have now learned that ‘snatched’ means I am killin it (?).” If I were grading this vocab test she would maybe get half points on that one.
Ultimately, this headline over-promised and under-delivered. Paltrow did not really learn what “snatched” means, and what she did learn came from her assistant rather than Kardashian herself. I know we’re all out here trying to get clicks, but a more accurate headline might read, “Gwyneth Paltrow Looked SO Confused About What to Do With a Bodysuit from Kim Kardashian.” It’s closer to the truth, which is what I have come to demand from a reputable outlet such as E! Online. Hopefully next time they’ll manage to snatch the house down while maintaining some journalistic integrity. We’re all counting on it.
