We already knew that the most fun kind of awards show is one where all the famous people are mingling at various tables. The Emmys confirmed this last week to the approximately seven people watching, but there was one issue. The attendees weren’t nearly drunk enough. Plus, it was just TV stars. I know there’s a lot of crossover now, but I think we’ll all be dead in a ditch before Brad Pitt shows up at the Emmys. The ideal awards show features a boozed up Jennifer Coolidge cavorting with a boozed up Michelle Yeoh. Finally, that kind of scenario is possible again, because the Golden Globes are coming back to television.
After taking a year off-air to sit in the corner and think about what they did (have no Black members and take bribes from movie studios), the Hollywood Foreign Press Association is back. It seems that the HFPA has done some serious reflection, because now six of their 108 members are Black and they’ve restructured their leadership team. Good work, everyone.
This is great news for everyone who does not give a heck about ethics and morals in awards shows. If you thought the Golden Globes were ever a serious, art-driven event, I would like to point you in the direction of the three nominations they gave to Salmon Fishing in the Yemen. Oh, you have no idea what that is? Exactly.
The Golden Globes have never been about being right, they are about being fun. Is there any other awards show where Amy Adams could win for Big Eyes? Chris Colfer for Glee? They are the only major awards show to recognize the brilliance of the movie Spy, and for that we must celebrate them.
Next year’s Globes are going to be especially fun, too. Baz Luhrmann will probably be there mingling with Mike White. Quinta Brunson might be there palling around with Tom Hanks. (As you can tell, I am betting big on Elvis at the Globes). Plus, the people who host the Globes have historically had a fun time doing it. Say what you will about Ricky Gervais — no, seriously, please say literally anything about him, he loves it — he had a fun time hosting the Globes. So did Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. Who will it be this year? If they have any sense, it will be Abbott Elementary’s Janelle James, but as we’ve learned over the past 18 months, they do not.
I am all in on the Globes coming back. I have no doubt that they will be fun, everyone will be drunk, and that Aoki Lee Simmons or whoever will do a great job as Miss Golden Globe. There is only one lingering question in my mind: Will Tom Cruise (who famously sent his three Golden Globes back to the organization after the controversy) be nominated for Top Gun: Maverick? And if he is, will he show up to celebrate his favorite thing, the magic of movies? Only time will tell.