Charlize Theron’s New Beau Is Nahla’s Dad

Otherwise known as Halle Berry’s nightmare ex

L: Rich Fury/Getty Images, R: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images

Charlize Theron has a boy toy for the summer, and you’ll never guess who it is. No, she’s not back together with Sean Penn (thank god), and she’s not shacking up with some rando businessman à la Jennifer Garner or Uma Thurman. According to Us Weekly, the Monster star is “hooking up” with… Nahla’s dad!

You don’t know who that is? Maybe you know him by his legal name, Gabriel Aubry? Nahla is the daughter he had with Halle Berry? He and Berry had a very public custody battle over Nahla? This is him with Berry and Tyler Perry in 2009?

Kevin Mazur/Getty Images

So yeah, that’s the guy who’s hooking up with Charlize Theron. According to Us Weekly’s source, the two are “very casual and enjoying each other.” That is probably for the best, because it does not seem like Aubry would be the ideal long-term partner. His major claim to fame is that he once started a fist fight with Berry’s then-boyfriend Olivier Martinez on Thanksgiving, leading to Martinez citizen’s arresting him. Last year, Berry described paying child support to him as “extortion.” A real cool dude, if you ask me.

As for Theron, she hasn’t dated anyone seriously since 2015, when she and Sean Penn broke up. Before that, she dated Third Eye Blind frontman/notable liar Stephan Jenkins and the actor Stuart Townsend. If Theron has a type, it’s white guys who make you go, “Him? Really?” Nahla’s dad is no different. I hope these two have a fun couple months together before Theron comes to her senses.