Ben Affleck Should Buy a Coca-Cola Freestyle Machine
Time to upgrade!
Jennifer Lopez is, among her many other talents, the greatest living chronicler of Ben Affleck. Her newsletter subscribers already know; she is always sharing tidbits of their life together, be it in words, photos, or videos. But this past weekend, she brought her scholarship out of the inbox and onto Instagram, where she posted a montage of clips to celebrate Affleck for Father’s Day.
Why am I telling you this now, a whole two days after the fact? Well, to be honest, I do not follow J.Lo on Instagram, and so I was only recently made aware of the significance of what she posted about her boo:
That’s right: It appears that in his office, Ben Affleck has a soda fountain emblazoned with a funky “Chill out… drink up!” It’s not just a Diet Pepsi fountain either — if you look closely, you can see the classic silver-and-red logo of Diet Coke.
But wait, there’s more. In the actual video posted by J.Lo, we get a clearer shot of the machine.
Yes, that is also the unmistakable logo for some variety of Mountain Dew, as well as a mystery fourth beverage. Immediately, some questions arise — namely, does that thing work? The machine does look like it’s from the early 2000s, so it might just be a bizarre piece of memorabilia. On the other hand, Affleck loves his Diet Coke, and any DC connoisseur knows that the dream is to have your very own fountain to get the best-tasting version of the soda.
Upon further observation, it strikes me as odd that any vintage fountain machine would A.) have both Coke and Pepsi products, and B.) only have the diet varieties. This screams custom to me, which brings us to our next question: Why doesn’t Ben Affleck have a Coca-Cola Freestyle machine? According to this Quora thread whose factual accuracy I am choosing to believe, it only costs about $21,000 to get one of those babies installed. For unlimited flavor combinations? That’s chump change to the man who brought us Blake Lively’s Boston accent in The Town!
Which leaves us with our remaining question and all its sub-inquiries: Under what circumstances does Benjamin use his machine? Does he actually need to have both Diet Coke and Diet Pepsi on tap just in case the mood strikes? Has he ever offered J.Lo a sip of the goods?
The worst part of this mystery is that we might never get an answer. We’ll all just have to chill out and drink up (the few droplets of information currently available to us).