New J-Lo matrimonial fodder Marc Anthony still has pics from his last wedding on his website. Be forewarned if you click through...his music plays in the background.

Limp Bizkit frontman/champion celeb-blogger Fred Durst has sold his house in Los Feliz for just under $2 million. According to the LAT, the gated, three-bedroom house is 3,100 square feet and has "expansive city views." It did not mention if the sale price included a visit from an exorcist or feng-shui expert to remove the bad vibes from the scores of skanks Durst nailed within the house's confines, or the framed, notarized certificate detailing his sexual encounters with Britney Spears.

These are the numbers that will make the passing of an elderly ex-President sting a bit less:

From the What The Fuck? Files: Just about five months after her dissolution of the Bennifer Hollywood Organism and one week after his divorce from a former Miss Universe, Jennifer Lopez and B-level Ricky Martin wave-rider Marc Anthony entered into a one-year Lopez Marriage-Like Agreement on Saturday. She's got about one more wedding left before anyone who buys a star map on Hollywood Blvd is legally entitled to a year sham marriage with her.

The always-reliable Star says they have the mega-, extra-, ultra-exclusive scoop that dreamy-eyed The Day After Tomorrow eye-dreamboat Jake Gyllenhaal will be the Man of Steel in the next Superman flick. It all smells a little Tobey from here, but that seemed to work out pretty well. Unfortunately for those with visually-triggered seizure issues, Star says that McG is going to direct. Even in the middle of a McG-induced grand mal, we have a feeling you'll still be pierced by Jake's dreamy-eyed X-ray vision. Did we mention Jake's eyes recently? We're told they're dreamy.

Thanks to this week's sponsor, who makes sure the Ramen noodles that we subsist on are of the Top variety. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer, send an email to advertising@gawker.com.

Waxy.org says that Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban has already hit the file-trading wire, literally moments after the first East Coast shows ended. Maybe Warner Bros. should have shipped some of those new-fangled night-vision goggles to New York instead of London? (Here's the highly amusing image that's being distributed with the pirated movie online.) Jack Valenti's hardly going to be able to keep his Metamucil down when he gets wind of this.

Who said that people in Hollywood don't have any original ideas? Oh, right, we did. Every day. In any case, we were just waiting for someone else to post a script on eBay. Didn't take long, as this message from an aspiring writer and sound capitalist informs us:

We're aware that some of our Mac-based readers using Internet Explorer are experiencing a somewhat less-optimized version of Defamer. But our technical-type people are hard at work to remedy the problem, pausing for at least a minute or two between lines of blow to look at the page and declare, "Yup, that shit's kinda fucked! Use fucking Safari, you Gates-blowers!" before returning to their more immediate pursuits. We hope it will be fixed shortly. Thanks for your patience. We love you all, and not in that fake, Hollywood way. We mean it.

This is exactly what's going to happen at the movies this weekend:

Wizbang does some digging and unearths one of O.J.'s Juiced "co-stars." And—warning, SHOCKER ahead—she's a hot blonde. We all know about O.J.'s, er, love-hate relationship with blondes. A quick perusal of her online profile reveals that she's done full frontal nudity, is a "professionally trained dancer with stage experience at Harrahs Lake Tahoe," and both her first and last names are "Lana." Well, Lana Lana, we hope that your working experience with Mr. Simpson was a pleasurable one, but watch yourself if you get a callback. That O.J.'s quite a prankster, and we wouldn't want you to get "juiced."

Entertainment Weekly is renaming its annual, storied pop-culture barometer "The IT List: The 100 Most Creative People in Entertainment," to the "The Must List: The 100 People We Love This Summer." Most of the salads that EW tosses in the issue wilt with the summer heat and are begging for slots on I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here! by the time the leaves turn, so putting a half-life on it seems like a reasonable move. Does this mean we'll get a "Should, If You're Not Doing Anything Else List" in the Fall? Maybe slap Brittany Murphy on the cover and call it an issue?

We promise you that we don't have some kind of secret product-placement deal with eBay—if we did, why are we eating cat food for breakfast? But we've got an update on the saga of the script that failed writer/failing online script-seller Mike Adamick has posted on eBay. We've got a bid, people! It's 500 bucks, the minimum bid, but still. Clicking through the bidder's eBay profile reveals that he's (it's almost certainly a "he," stick with us) a record collector. It makes perfect sense; a "record collector" is about the only flavor of dork that could possibly be made marginally cooler by buying a screenplay on eBay.

Lindsay Lohan just auctioned one of her signed bras on eBay. The winning bid was $10,001, and even though the proceeds nobly go to a woman's heart disease charity, we think someone egregiously overpaid. The item's a fake—everyone knows that Lindsay doesn't wear bras (NSFW).

Instead of spending the day racking his brain trying to think of an appropriate gift to commemorate the tenth anniversary of Nicole Brown's murder (the tenth is tin, right?), O.J. Simpson did what any self-respecting, grieving ex-spouse would do: go on national TV and blame her for her own death while plugging his new reality show. Simpson tells Fox News Channel's Greta Van Susteren that he will star in a Punk'd-style prank show, in which his wacky, ostensibly non-murdering Juice persona goes around "juicing" people, as in "you've been juiced!" Wow, doesn't that sound life-threatening, yet somehow hilarious? But the producers should probably talk to their lawyers and accountants; the show could get expensive. The last time he allegedly "juiced" somebody, his bank account got killed in a civil trial.

The Smoking Gun has yet another wonderful, fresh legal filing for America's amusement. This time, recent Halle Berry ex-husband and admitted "sex addict" Eric Benet is trying to "determine the validity and/or enforceability of the parties' prenuptial agreement and subsequent amendments thereto." In terms that the rest of us can understand, Benet is trying to bust that prenup like a piggy bank and see what Catwoman coin falls out. Berry may want to pay him off just to avoid the continued embarrassment of walking in on him trying to fuck her Oscar while he's "just picking up some things he forgot."

We just heard that God-rocking, intestinal-distress-inducing band Creed is breaking up. Sorry to see them go, whatever.

Now available on eBay: The Barbra Streisand Custom Transportation Vehicle, an RV which the seller promises is "owned and used by Barbra in lieu of limousine or car service. It has also been used by her for additional privacy on several film locations. Currently, she is using it on the set of Meet the Fockers."

Before we get to the Ted blind item guesses, an administrative note re: The Easiest Blind Item In The World, Unless You Are Deaf To Sarcasm post. To all of you who wrote in with solutions to the utterly perplexing NBA item: You are much smarter than we are. That never would have occurred to us. Never.