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Before we get to the Ted blind item guesses, an administrative note re: The Easiest Blind Item In The World, Unless You Are Deaf To Sarcasm post. To all of you who wrote in with solutions to the utterly perplexing NBA item: You are much smarter than we are. That never would have occurred to us. Never.

Ted sez: "Uh! Does this fake-girlfriend stuff get boring, or what? Yes, yes, yes—there's yet another terribly big celeb who's pulling the unsuspecting wool over the eyes of Middle American masses (kinda think the crusty coastal types are more into this dude, however). Our latest same-sex star?" Read the whole "One Boyish Blind Vice" here. (Scroll down a bit.)

You say: Guesses after the jump.

You say: "Ryan Seacrest" because "he's been bandying his 'girlfriend' about too much lately, too many fake photo opps," "'crusty' = crest," and "note Casablanca's use of crusty/coastal to evoke his last name." But what about all of that straight-guy horsing around with Simon Cowell and Randy Jackson?

You also say: "Adam Brody" because of "fake-girlfriend (rachel bilson)/crusty coastal types/frame isn't exactly towering/reported g-f/ boob-tube work." Hmm. He's sucking face everywhere with Summer Whatshername, and he looks like he means it.

You also say: "Elijah Wood," "Nick Lachey," and "the newly tan, bald and waxed Joey Lawrence." Someone's always gotta pick on the Hobbit. For shame, readers.