Cityrag compares these photos taken of Courtney Love at a September probation violations hearing and a Friday court appearance in which a merciful judge allowed Love to finish rehab in an outpatient facility, surmising that some eye work might've enhanced the apparent effects of clean living. Bravo to Love's image consultant for realizing that some subtle cosmetic surgery might influence the court to take it easy on her, and abandoning an earlier, far more transparent plan to bolt her head to a high-backed chair to avoid another embarrassing, ill-timed instance of the "sentencing nods."

Radar has the latest from the disaster-befallen Miami Vice set, where three hurricanes, a gunfight, two bloated, hungover stars and one pissy, aloof director have added up to one hell of a high turnover rate among the crew:

In the dark places in our soul that we don't like to talk about at cocktail parties, we were secretly terrified that we might never again experience the unbridled, brain-smoothing joy of Chris Tucker shouting high-pitched expletives at a seemingly uncomprehending Jackie Chan while shit blows up around them. It seems that New Line is finally ready to shovel cash onto the raging fire of another Rush Hour sequel, locking up Tucker, Chan, screenwriter Jeff Nathanson, and, most crucially, visionary fauxteur Brett Ratner. Variety has the staggering details:

With Brokeback Mountain's premiere just around the corner, its producers are delighted that co-stars Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams fell in love on the set, providing a welcome counterpoint to all the "gay cowboy movie" talk. To thank his leading man, producer James Schamus kick-starts Ledger's public re-heteroization:

Moments before the chorus of "Don't Cha" was about to kick in, something in the champagne room perhaps a foreboding Dickensian ghost killed rapper Nelly's lapdance buzz, and suddenly, all he could think about was the children:

Just because this is only a three-day week doesn't mean you only get sixty percent of your usual joy in the box office results. In the spirit of the coming holiday, take your full bliss from the numbers:

· The Guilds demand a code of conduct for product integration, including full disclosure at the top of any program that features embedded ads. Later that morning, a panel of network heads moderated by Anderson Cooper is bumrushed by a disgruntled reality television writer and some WGA guerrillas. Bloody reprisals from the networks still TK, just as soon as they can find some reliable non-union labor.
· Brittany Murphy is dumped by ICM and Brillstein-Grey. In the damage-control scramble, a rep doth protest too much.
· Arianna Huffington and Yahoo! throw us a bash to remember. We offer to repay the favor by having them over to our one-bedroom apartment for our annual holiday Edward Fortyhands soiree, which they graciously decline.
· Yes, all were welcome at the Xbox party/Fake Engagementpalooza, but you really figured out where you stood in Hollywood's pecking order when it came time to hand out the lootbags.
· Jude Law and Sienna Miller rekindle lost passions in stinky, rented shoes worn by thousands of other people.
· Scoundrel Chris Klein attends the Just Friends premiere with a mysterious woman known only as "Creepier Suzanne Somers."
· Whether or not they can sing is irrelevant. They can catfight, and that's far more entertaining.
· Buster, busted: Arrested Development star Tony Hale is spotted buying his own canceled series on DVD.

· If just about everything in Hollywood devolves into a dick-measuring contest, why should art collecting be any different? The LA Weekly's Nikki Finke looks at erstwhile superagent Mike Ovitz's attempts to have the biggest dick in town.
· There may be no better way to welcome the opening of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire than to watch video in which one of its (legal!) stars is topless.
· It would be horribly rude if we didn't wish a happy 37th birthday to Owen "The Butterscotch Stallion" Wilson. To celebrate the occasion, please enjoy this picture of Hollywood's Official Playmate Inspector plying his trade.
· As it turns out, the Lindsay Lohan-Jason Lewis story is true.
· LA.comfidential catches FPJ having dinner with a non-SMG female, suspects foul play.
· Have you heard? The critics are raving about Rent! All two of them.

Friday
· Recent Weather Channel addition Lewis Black ("Why are hurricanes so STUPID!") brings his trademark angry man comedy and accompanying agitated gesticulations to the Wiltern.
· Friday Night Music: The Dandy Warhols at the Avalon, Shout Out Louds and the Sun at the Troubadour, and, of course, Old 97s at the El Rey.
· Because movie screenings are always more enjoyable with celebrity involvement, Alec Baldwin introduces Gus Van Sant's Elephant at the Skirball Center.
Saturday
· As part of their ongoing series, New And Creative Ways To Make Use Of Space Wasted On The Dead, the Hollywood Forever Cemetery is hosting a round of "Tombstone Hold 'Em," which we're not even going to attempt to explain in this space.
· Saturday Night Music: The Prix play the Echo, and Dios Malos are at the El Rey.
· Mayday films hosts a competition of 15 short films, all made in 24 hours and all titled Yellow Hammer, giving the filmmakers two things to blame if their movie doesn't meet box office expectations.
Sunday
· It's like celebrity band Christmas! Juliette & the Licks are at the Troubadour, while the future Mr. Lindsay Lohan (Jared Leto) appears with his fancily-websited band 30 Seconds to Mars at the Sunset Virgin Megastore.
· Press photographer James Nachtwey reflects on what it means to be a press photographer at On Being a Press Photographer at the Getty Center.

The American system of celebrity jurisprudence is so critically overtaxed that even A-list actors like Russell Crowe, who famously took up the cause of unacceptable customer service by bludgeoning a concierge with a telephone in early June, have to wait almost half a year to receive their token fines and stern wrist slaps:

According to this generously scarequoted report from the set of the VH1 celebrity talent competition But Can They Sing? (Answer: no, they can not), it ain't exactly all incense and daisy-exchanging love-ins over there:

Has the effort of dragging your shackles over to the office water cooler given you case of the Gloomy Friday Afternoons? Then you need to spend some time thinking about how much richer this weekend's movies are going to make your bosses:

It's Day Three of This Week's Fake Engagement of the Century, and developments in the Kimberly Stewart-Talan Torriero impending nuptials are flying at us faster than $20 bills at a homeless man willing to humiliate himself for Paris Hilton's amusement. When last we posted, Stewart was flashing her five-carat engagement zirconia at a Microsoft video game system party. Page Six now tells us that the wedding is not to be some cliffside affair drowned out by the whir of helicopter blades in the distant future. For hot to trot Stewart, reality show husband sex can't happen soon enough:

If you're anything like us (and we know you are—would it kill you to wear pants to work?), your favorite part of the week is reading a list of this site's incredibly generous sponsors. Yay! We're madly in love with them and we don't care who knows it! If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and dangle your tantalizing bits in front of the world's most avid consumers, see this page.

· Paramount rewards South Park's Trey Parker and Matt Stone for ridiculing their biggest movie star with a three-year production deal. The team has also formed their own company, Trunity, a Mediar company, a division of True Mediar, a Unity Corpbopoly. OK, we get it, you're wacky! [Variety]
· The OC continues to throw new characters at its third season story problems, this time signing up thirteen's Nikki Reed for a four episode arc. Still, should be a better addition than the Preppy Psychotic Statutory Rapist Dean. [THR]
· The ratings sweeps race is looking like a two-horse affair, with ABC and CBS battling for position "down the stretch." To further belabor the metaphor: NBC is still stuck at the gate, humping its dead steed with eyes squeezed shut, thinking of the Friends cast. [Variety]
· "Self-described hot-rod enthusiast" Jon Favreau will write and direct hot-rod drama Johnny Zero for Columbia. We hate to be so cynical, but why do we get the feeling that his assistant was printing out every Google result for "history of hot-rodding" the night before the studio meeting? [THR]
· Bernie Mac is developing an "All in the Family-like" sitcom for Fox. But this time, of course, the Archie Bunker character will be black instead of Michael Rappaport. [Variety]

Faced with the prospect that none of the shows that they're currently working on for their sweeps-yanked, reduced-order critical darling may ever air, the Arrested Development gang is coping by getting self-referential. Variety reports that an upcoming show (subtly named for the online campaign to rescue the series from cancellation) goes balls-out-of-the-bottom-of-Tobias'-Daisy-Dukes for the meta:

It would appear the wheels of justice turn particularly slowly in the land of frites and Van Damme, as a Brussels court has just ruled that a Madonna song from 1998 ("Frozen" you remember it, in the video she's alone in the desert dressed like Lily Munster, then she presto-change-os into a Doberman Pinscher) was plagiarized:

Faced with her client's abrupt, simultaneous dumping by ICM and Brillstein-Grey, Brittany Murphy's publicist can offer only a weak, last-resort rebuttal, in the classic, messy-break-up, "No way! She totally dumped them first!" mold. From Page Six:

Is there any colder dish of revenge than one served from the grave? True, Harvey Weinstein's final all-bomb slate of Miramax releases may not look great lumped together on his IMDb profile, but the demonic jollies he's no doubt getting over Disney's $313 million cliff-dive more than makes up for it:

As mentioned in an earlier post, and as reported today by every news outlet on Earth including a gatefold three-color spread in The Vatican Dispatch, Kimberly Stewart and Laguna Beach's Talan Torriero announced their engagement last night at an Xbox launch party, with Stewart gleefully using her (self-financed?) 5-carat ring to take the eye out of anyone who didn't manage to run away screaming in time.