On Wednesday America was treated to video of the first lady's undulating rear when she competed in a hula hoop contest. Now the hip-swiveling sensation is sweeping the nation, one awkward female news anchor at a time.

85 percent of adult Americans have cellphones, which means 15 percent don't. Who are these mysterious, ringtone-free luddites?

Now that she's endorsed an uber-conservative third-party candidate in New York, is Palin ready to start that far-right alternative to the GOP that everyone keeps hoping she will, if only because it'd be comedic gold?

When Ken Feinberg, the guy Obama charged with reining in bonuses at bailed-out firms, asked AIG who its top-paid executives were, they couldn't answer. That place is a black hole of money.

Check out this picture of disgraced Dolce & Gabbana flack-turned alleged felon voicemail hacker Ali Wise being like, "OMG...Muscle Milk Light?!" What? Oh, today's news: Ali Wise was mean, say snitches. Others say: Nuh uh!

Howard Hughes' failure to procreate, plus his crappy taste in real estate, has resulted in a small town's worth of wannabe heirs, all of whom will receive virtually nothing when they sell Howard's last swath of land next year.

It's so fun to see the media wars play out in actual tiffs between actual human beings in actual rooms together. Take this passive-aggressive clash between Google's Larry Page, programmer, and IAC's Barry Diller, onetime movie mogul.

[A New Yorker counts sheep in Sheep's Meadow in Central Park today during a rather warm fall afternoon. Image via Getty]

That's right, the guys who haul pianos and music stands at Carnegie Hall are raking in the big bucks. Just how much? It's more than you could even imagine.

[Michelle Obama competes in Jack Rabbit Slim's hula contest during a photo op on the White House lawn today to show kids that it's cool to exercise. Image via Getty]

Weep for literary culture. After Salman Rushdie's ex-girlfriend accused him of still pining for his ex-wife Padma Lakshmi in Page Six yesterday, Rushdie has responded in kind today. We are all trapped in the eighth grade, which never ends.

Pretty blond fashion PR women can get away with anything—except being charged with surreptitiously hacking the voicemails of multiple romantic rivals in a fit of jealous insanity. That's not a good "PR Play," it turns out. Sorry, Ali Wise.

Steve Adler resigned as editor in chief of BusinessWeek, the New York Post's Keith Kelly reports, effective as soon as Bloomberg LP completed its expected takeover of the McGraw-Hill magazine. This was to be expected.

There's only ten shopping days left before Halloween. So, it's time for Halloween costume listicles! Lots of people want to tell you what to wear. We'd like to spare you the humiliation of following their advice.

That's right, today Real Housewife of New York Frankel confirmed that she is pregnant. Did she know before she signed on for her own reality show? Or before she got engaged? And what will Jill Zarin say? So many questions!

Hey everyone, Barack Obama is having a late lunch at Craftsteak right now! It's the latest of the safe choices the president has made when dining out in our fair city. What do his dining choices say about him?

It appears Aaron Sorkin has confirmed many of the casting choices for his upcoming Facebook movie. If only Silicon Valley were this good looking. There's someone from Gossip Girl, Melanie Griffith's daughter — even a very built male model.

The Secret Service is overwhelmed by an unprecedented wave of threats against Barack Obama. Our prediction for what happens next: when they request additional funding, Glenn Beck notices that the initials for Secret Service are "SS."

According to Page Six, Salman Rushdie's ex-girlfriend says he's "cowardly, dysfunctional, and immature" and won't stop talking about Padma Lakshmi, the one that got away.

Onetime TV star Bronson Pinchot has some not-so-nice things to say about Tom Cruise. Fate will bring Octomom and Jon Gosselin together. Salman Rushdie is still pining for Padma. Presenting your Tuesday morning Gossip Roundup!