Paris and Nicky Hilton's little brother, 18-year-old Barron Nicholas (he uses his middle name for his last on his high school Facebook page), wants you to know that he is a total badass. No really! This apple is totes not going to even think about falling far from the tree! Barron smokes pot! Barron drinks what might be champagne while wearing suits! The youngest Hilton tosses 'em back in his pool! Or at least, he pours Captain Morgan's down his front for the camera, but that's fine—we're sure the help won't mind cleaning it up later.

I should include end-of-year lists. But there are three even more annoying artifacts you'll be stuck with every freaking day of the coming year.

Why all the lists heading into 2008? Well, laziness. That, and the urge to reflect on the year gone by. No, mostly laziness. And in that spirit, we present you Valleywag's top 10 list of top 10 lists. Oh yeah — our lazy, it's meta.

Yes, Facebook, I am getting married. I presume you know this because my fiancée and I are listed as engaged to each other in our profiles. It's even possible you know the wedding is soon because she registered us on TheKnot.com, a Beacon partner. And even though she opted not to have you spam our friends about it, it's conceivable that you're still keeping track of her activity on the site, despite promising to discard the data. That's fine. Eventually we were going to tell you about the wedding anyway. But, Facebook, you might want to know: I'm not an American Express cardholder. And also: I'm not going to buy that dress. Oh, and one more thing?

In an effort to rival Facebook, Google has decided to label anyone users chat with in Gmail a "friend." One privilege friends get is they can tell which stories you're sharing with other users in Google Reader. But instead of building a better social network, Google might just be a better Grinch. "This little feature," one woman writes in Google Groups "has actually RUINED CHRISTMAS for my family!" Here's her not so Merry little Christmas tale in 100 words.

At last, I've received a real-life, actual Beacon message — the controversial Facebook ad format that reports on your friends' activities elsewhere on the Web. The news flash? My boss, Gawker Media publisher Nick Denton, is going to see Will Smith thriller I Am Legend. This ruins my arthouse-film image of him. Damn you, Mark Zuckerberg!

"2008 is the year Facebook grinds to — not a halt — but definitely a slowdown. The backlash is already here. I've said it before; I'll say it again: Facebook flight." Ah, the sweet, juicy sound of BusinessWeek's Arik Hesseldahl plopping his cojones on the table. We credit his bravado, but he's wrong. Beacon was bad for Facebook on the blogs, but users hardly noticed.

They were going to CHANGE EVERYTHING. Whoops. presenting five biggest technology disappointments of the past year. No, not Vista and the Kindle — you didn't expect anything there.

Valleywag is of course known for its dead-on accuracy, so our predictions for 2008 need no introduction. Inside, my 25 predictions (made without inside information) cover the futures of Facebook, Google, Digg, YouTube, Twitter, the Wall Street Journal, Apple, Yahoo, Gawker Media, AOL, Dell, LOLcats, the president, and more.

BusinessWeek roped VC blogger Fred Wilson into putting a number on Facebook. "If I had to buy Facebook right now, I think $5 billion to $7 billion would be the right price." If I had to buy Facebook right now, I'd need more than $12 a post. And goodnight! Tip your waitresses.

Facebook application Who's Online by Applehat Studios has 87,053 daily active users. 87,053 users with a lot of annoyed friends. Why? Because you can't block Who's Online. "I just found out that even though I've changed my privacy settings so as NOT to show whether I'm online or not, I show up as being online in this app," writes one. Another: "Even though I blocked this application four days ago I still appear on my friends sites as a white box with a question mark." App developer Cameron Chunn's response? Blame Facebook. "The app doesn't invade your privacy any more then Facebook itself does."

Oh no! Mark Cuban has too many friends on Facebook. The graceful Web tycoon just bumped his head against Facebook's 5,000-friend limit. Now Cuban faces the daunting challenge of deciding who among the 100 friend requests a day he should honor. Of course he blogged about it.

Following its approval of the Google-DoubleClick merger, the FTC put out a series of proposals regarding privacy and online advertising. Dear God they're boring. But relevant nonetheless. Here are the bullet points.

Tim Faulkner:

This is an occasional column by one of the authors of The Underminer, Or, The Best Friend Who Casually Destroys Your Life. Did you know that some people on Facebook are better than others? It's true! But it's okay, your "friends" still like you! Just keep poking away at them.

The first time we noted Facebook's porn problem, a commenter responded, "That isn't actually full frontal nudity, though." Well, 0x6772, whoever you are, your wish is Facebook's dirty command. Here's the latest pornographic ad Facebook failed to keep off its servers.

Before Fortune magazine's little dustup about Facebook's controversial new advertising products, Andy Serwer's court jester, David Kirkpatrick, produced a hardly hard-hitting video on the subject. Just how much of a puff piece was this? Fortune managed to dig up some intercutting shots of a very enthusiastic Facebook user. Recognize her?

With precious few deals to make, phone calls from needy clients to dodge, and script coverage to pretend to have read during the strike, the industry's idling agents have been spending their sudden surfeit of free time congregating inside Facebook's virtual Mr. Chow dining room, giddily partaking of all the cutting-edge networking and sheep-tossing features they were once far too busy to enjoy. This week's NY Observer examines this phenomenon, even getting several reps on the record about how they use their favorite new toy:

Facebook's porn problem continues. First there were the giant mammary glands and then a whole lot of butt. Now, a tipster send us this "sponsored" story from his Facebook news feed. We want to know, what exactly does "so much more" entail? If this ad isn't mantastic enough for you, yet another tipster discovered yet another ad right up your alley. A warning: Following this link will leave you exposed to ginormous biceps and a sultry gaze.

Facebook has closed the door on one opportunity to make money off the popular social network. Mark Zuckerberg's enterprise has settled a lawsuit, before it reached class-action status, over unwanted text messages being delivered to reused mobile-phone numbers. Lindsey Abrams, the Indiana woman who filed the suit, alleged she received thousands of unsolicited messages at a cost of 10 cents each after purchasing a mobile phone with a number previously owned by a Facebook user. She had no way to stop the unwanted messages, since she didn't have access to that user's account.