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· Paramount prepares a bid for DreamWorks SKG, obviously fulfilling a secret deal with Steven Spielberg and David Geffen to drive up their studio's price for inevitable purchaser Universal. For his cooperation, Brad Grey will receive a truckload of stuffed E.T. dolls and unlimited weekend stays at Geffen's Malibu compound—including optional day-long shiatsu massage by the strongest-handed masseuse the Gay Mafia has to offer. [THR/Reuters]
· It's like First & 10 meets Unscripted, but the actors are taller: George Clooney and Steven Soderbergh's Section Eight sets up an unscripted comedy series about the NBA at HBO. [Variety]
· Spelling Television lets go of almost all of its staff, prejudicially shitcanning about 25 employees. (No word on whether Aaron Spelling's personal office chef escaped the bloodletting.) The company keeps its bigwigs and becomes a mere pod at Paramount TV. [THR]
· Scarlett Johansson continues to Hoover up all available mid-20s female roles, signing on for Christopher Nolan's dueling-magician pic The Prestige. [Variety]
· Jeff Probst will host Survivor for at least 2 more years, including the franchise's most ambitious installment to date, Survivor: Locked in a Janitorial Closet with a Well-Criscoed Richard Hatch. [Variety]
Tom Ford has become something of a crack-addict of late; from bearing all in a W magazine spread to his Amber Nude line of Estee Lauder cosmetics, the guy has just about gone naked-crazy. So when he was offered the guest editorship of this year's Vanity Fair Hollywood Issue, well, let's just say there were more than a few silent prayers around the Conde Nast HQ that he would steer clear of any Elizabeth Taylor tribute photo essays. Luckily, that potentially mass-traumatizing crisis was averted, which is not to say Ford's bareness bias did not lead to complications:
Yesterday, an e-mail announcing that UTA's apparently Willy Wonka -themed holiday gift (Johnny Depp's a client, natch, and the Charlie and the Chocolate Factory DVD is still available at a retailer near you!) hit the inbox of potentially lucky assistants:
Brimming with seasonal cheer and seeking to celebrate Christmas in the time-honored tradition of garish lawn-decorating, a Cranston, RI man has erected a holiday-themed shrine to the modern embodiment of glad tidings and goodwill to man, Paris Hilton. It didn't take long for the media to arrive and solicit opinions from awestruck neighbors:
"I've got a few men I respect very much and one would be Frank Gehry," Brad Pitt told Vanity Fair, regarding the world-reknowned architect whose shiny Dr. Seussian creations, such as our own Walt Disney Concert Hall, have become arguably the most admired and spoken about structures of our time. The two are reportedly "close friends" as well as teacher and apprentice. Newsweek sat down with Gehry recently, and asked him about his unlikely confrere:
For two glorious sentences, we thought that the NY Times just might be using a Brokeback Mountain review to launch the initial installment of a major daily newspaper's first-ever serialized erotic novel:
· Tragically, Matt Damon's baby will eventually be subjected to endless playground ridicule for being born only half-famous. Is there a special school for that? There should be.
· A white hat, a black hat, a young man, an old man...a showdown at the OK Baggage claim.
· Why are we killing ourselves trying to sell t-shirts when we could be making so much more money in another line of business?
· Say what you will about Kanye West, but the man has no problem with low self-esteem.
· Because no ArcLight-hosted opportunity to pepper a director with questions following a screening of his movie must go unlinked, Curtis Hanson (and screenwriter Susannah Grant) will do a Q&A after a superspecial presentation of In Her Shoes tonight.
· Your musical options: The Rapture at the Viper Room; Shooter Jennings at the Troubadour; The Donnas at the El Rey.
· The Getty Center presents a discussion on photojournalism, informatively titled "Making News: A Discussion of Photojournalism," with a panel comprised of current and former LA and NY Times editors and practicing journalists. Hey, if this is your kind of thing, you don't need us to dress it up and take it to the prom for you.
Nick Nolte is being sued by the family of a girl who was drugged with GHB and raped at his home almost three years ago (he wasn't there at the time, but the suit claims he should have been "aware of the propensity" of his security guard and one of his regular underage houseguests to provide "alcohol and/or drugs to minor children.") The incident hasn't exactly scared son Brawley straight—he was arrested last April in West Virginia for marijuana possession. Now a judge has decided to allow the jury to hear every illicit detail regarding father and son:
So we just had this great idea: If we come up for an official-sounding name that suggests a recurring feature, something like Thursday Afternoon Rumor Mill, then the totally unsubstantiated (but very rapidly spreading) chatter that we're hearing might sound somewhat less wacky. We've been barraged with rumors concerning the situation at Sony, with one saying that Amy Pascal is out, Columbia co-president of production Matt Tolmach is getting promoted to studio head, and other co-president Doug Belgrad is taking a production deal. Another (possibly oppositional, possibly complementary?) batch of rumor-mongerers seem to think that Pascal is getting promoted to co-CEO of Sony with Michael Lynton. Will Pascal be rewarded or punished for Sony's bomb-strewn year? Will she show her usual flair for occasion-appropriate dress by wearing a festive flack jacket to Sony's holiday party next week? Only time (or a press release, or a story in Variety, or a fresh set of contradictory tracking board rumors) will tell.
· But you knew this already: Mariah Carey, Kanye West and John Legend lead Grammy nominees with 8 each. [Variety, THR]
· Usual awards seasons starter-pistol firer National Board of Review discovers that its ballots were FUBAR'd, forcing them to postpone their announcement a few days and risk being drowned out by the roughly ten thousand other organizations releasing their awards lists. [Variety]
· Seth MacFarlane teams up with Family Guy alum Ricky Blitt to resssurect his live-action comedy pilot Becoming Glen. Oh, how we love it when sitcom writers get quoted: "'Sadly,' the project has a substantial autobiographical component, Blitt said. 'Not only did I, too, live at home with my parents past the age of 30, like Glen, I have OCD, too. Though, not to toot my own horn, I personally had unpaid-for consensual intercourse at the ripe young age of 31.'" [THR]
· Dismayed by the death of the action hero, Stealth director Rob Cohen throws his hands in the air and seeks solace between the pendulous breasts of a biopic about sexploitation flick auteur Russ Meyer. [Variety]
· Sarah Michelle Gellar, now way too big a star for sequels of Japanese horror remakes, signs on for the minimum contractually allowable amount of screentime in The Grudge 2. [THR]
Early this morning, Comedy Central issued a press release announcing a second season of The Showbiz Show with David Spade. The reaction all over Hollywood, now on "high alert," has been predictable and disastrous, and one needs only to throw open the nearest window to watch the terrified citizenry running through the streets, yanking out their hair by the roots as they desperately search for the scarce armor-plated underthings that might—just might—prevent the show's sphincter-rending host from "tearing them a new one" with his drowsy, joyless recitations of Telepromptered copy. Clasp your hands over your ears and prevent further hearing loss from the air-raid sirens sounded by this excerpt from the press release, complete with typically hilarious Spade commentary:
