Some are calling it a "public debut," and yet others simply view it as a rich guy getting good concert seats, but Alex Rodriguez's front-row hand-off of a water bottle to Madonna during her performance Wednesday night in Miami signaled something official in their long-rumored, scandal-plagued courtship.
· And magazines with the good sense to celebrate Perfect on their covers. What are YOU thankful for? Maybe it's similar to what these celebrities are thankful for! · Seth MacFarlane dazzles Conan audiences with his wide array of cartoon voices and artificial-tanner-drenched hands. · As we mentioned yesterday serial nuptialist David Lynch was kind of enough to sign copies of his new DVD box set for fans at Amoeba. He left the cow at home. · And now a message of thanksgiving from Brody Jenner: "I'm proud to announce that my new series on MTV, Bromance is set to premiere on Monday, December 29th! You're gonna love the show, Ryan Seacrest and I are Executive Producing the show, so be sure to check it out. Happy Thanksgiving!" · The LA Weekly is really, really, really, really thankful for Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.
Last we heard from Rajan Zed, the "acclaimed Hindu statesman" was single-handedly derailing The Love Guru's chances for interfaith box-office success. Having spectacularly accomplished that mission, he has since moved on to an even more dire crisis of modern spirituality. To wit: Can Hinduism survive Jessica Alba's body art?It's a tough question, but the emboldened Zed wasn't backing down in a press release tossed over the Defamer transom:
Those Hogans sure love their restraining orders! Not long after mama cougar Linda claimed that ex-husband Hulk should stay away from her based on a completely made-up court order, her young, son-resembling boyfriend has attempted to secure an actual one against the American Gladiators host. Sadly, the 19-year-old Charley Hill's claim that Hulk "pulled up next to him [at a stoplight] and stared at him" was found to be insufficient grounds for issuing a restraining order. Also, the judge found that Hulk's attempt to piledrive Charley, then throw him against the ropes was terribly, terribly fake. [TMZ]
Sure, sure, Titanic couple Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio are reuniting on-screen in the upcoming Revolutionary Road, and that's great. Still, the romantics over here at Defamer HQ would prefer a reprise of the light and fluffy lovers played by Clive Owen and Julia Roberts in Closer ("You like him coming in your face?" "Yes!" "What does it taste like?" "It tastes like you but sweeter!"), so this trailer for their upcoming Duplicity will have to do. Oh, and what's this? A brand-new costar in the form of Julia Roberts's thong? How did the suddenly sexed-up Natalie Portman get left out of this Closer coffee klatch? The trailer, after the jump:
· Thanksgiving Eve Music Round-Up: Nas at Club Nokia, Matthew Sweet at El Rey, Circus Minor at Spaceland, Lady GaGa at the Staples Center. · Let's be thankful for skating in warm weather: L.A. Kings Downtown on Ice continues at Pershing Square. · Check out the new ego-powered Smart car at the L.A. Auto Show. All the agents want one!
There may not be a fresh posting on Turkey Day, but you can bet we'll be sitting in front of the television instead of explaining to various aunts and uncles what blogs are and why we don't shower very often. For Thursday, if you can somehow avoid sports and stay awake despite consuming a half box of wine and a full pound of turkey, check out Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew [10 PM, VH1]. Mary Carey stops by to encourage the group and Jeff Conaway ruins more of his relationships with other humans. If you aren't thankful after watching former addicts with weird skin get clean, then you're too far gone. As for Wednesday, we've got tonight, why don't you stay? WATCH Rosie Live [8 PM, NBC] - Rosie hits the boards in her triumphant return to NBC. Her stint playing the straight woman to the short guy on Little Britain USA did nothing to quench the whole lacka Rosie in our lives. Joining Rosie are a bunch of entertainers who could never hope to upstage her: Ne-Yo, Kathy Griffin, Harry Connick Jr., Clay Aiken, Jane Krakowski, Alec Baldwin, and Liza Minnelli. OK, Liza could steal the show, but Rosie would be fine with that.
Clearly, the most pressing aspect of President-elect Barack Obama's transition is what kind of freaking puppy he will be getting his daughters Malia and Sasha — and everyone's weighing in with their opinion. Frequent watchers of The View know that Barbara Walters is borderline obsessive about imploring the Obamas to adopt a pooch similar to her Havanese dog Cha Cha (short for "Cha Cha Cha," natch), so when it was announced that Walters would be interviewing the couple for a special to air this week, we immediately combed through the transcript to see if she would take the opportunity to push Cha Cha on them once more.
It took four fired writers, a Will Smith-defied picket line, an open letter from Tina Fey (among others), and an intervention by the NAACP, but we're happy to report that the impossible dream has finally landed at Tyler Perry Studios: The mogul is finally coming around to a deal with the WGA.The Guild sends word today that it reached an agreement with Perry after five months of negotiations, during which a handful of veteran scribes for his series Meet the Browns and House of Payne were terminated for attempting to unionize the staff. The catch? Those writers will not be coming back, according to a WGA release issued late this morning. But, they added, the mogul "thanked them for their services and wished them well in their future endeavors." Surely that's of little comfort to the reeling Tyler Perry Four, who now confront the reality they may never again have the enviable opportunity to mass-produce Madea jokes for a Perry-starved populace. We hope the NAACP negotiators can sleep at night.
Spoiler Alert! A brand-new promo for season five of Lost (that still, sadly, features the ear abortion forced on us by The Fray in a Dharma-like experiment) reveals the answer to one of this season's most-speculated upon mysteries: will Matthew Fox still be shaving his chest? We've covered the evidence up with Lost's smoke monster for now, but after the jump comes the shocking reveal:
As Gays across the nation make last-minute plans for their Milk screening parties—a lot like Sex and the City parties, except instead of Manolos and cocktail dresses you and your best girlfriends show up in Adidas Gazelles and crack-riding gym shorts—we thought we'd once again pay a visit to its white-hot screenwriter. That would be Dustin Lance Black, the frequently shirtless recovering Mormon introduced to you recently on this very blogspot.
When you're halfway into your forty-sixth season, as NBC's long-running crime drama Law & Order is, there are only so many storylines left to do that haven't been done before. Thus, it's no surprise that the show's "ripped from the headlines" method of generating plot points would eventually lead it to the death of Heath Ledger (you'll get your turn soon, Mario!), though it's impressive just how deeply they botched their opportunity. Says Page Six:
It took a rumored meeting of superstars like Warren Beatty, Jack Nicholson and Meryl Streep to get us to care again about a potential actors strike, and a hasty bit of rumor-debunking this morning to dash all the intrigue. But after a retraction, a non-retraction, and a few sharp personal jabs between dueling industry journos Nikki Finke and Sharon Waxman, all we know is that this match in their ongoing feud deserves a bit of play-by-play.We amended yesterday's news of a top-secret actor's meeting to reflect Waxman's retraction, which occurred overnight after Nikki revealed how Waxman got punk'd. Except, Waxman noted this morning, she didn't retract the story; she was just correcting her errors and saved the piece to "draft." Right. Still, Waxman emphasizes, "the essence of the story is correct": A high-octane, strike-gauging meeting took place at SAG president Alan Rosenberg's request, though not at the time of federal mediation between SAG and the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers, which would a serious no-no. But what about Finke's allegations?
We were shocked to learn that Dancing with the Stars continued its search for America's Next Top Cha Cha-ing Z-Lister after Cloris Leachman was unceremoniously ejected from the proceedings. (Did they really have to insist her partner grab her by her limbs, spin her around, and launch her into the bleachers? That still seems excessively harsh to us.) But continue it did, and multi-purpose, large-breasted Hollywood personality Brooke Burke deservedly took the show's coveted disco ball trophy.To pad out this foregone conclusion, first casualty Jeff Ross was invited back to roast the contestants, presenting the perfect opportunity to get in a few gay-themed jabs at Lance Bass. Because the gayest thing to come out of DWTS has to be Lance Bass—not the fuchsia breakaway sleeves, the Dr. Drew-elicited waterworks, or the soiled dance belt Ross had to peel out from between his ass cheeks following his humiliating first-week defeat. [Dancing with the Stars]
Foreseeing a day when curtailed Hills shooting leaves her without anybody to antagonize, or maybe just catching a faint whiff of those $12 million salaries (or something else) around the corner, Audrina Patridge is angling to join the Twilight revolution. The starlet tells MTV today that, like, hell yeah she's a fan of the vampire novels and their blockbuster movie adaptation, and she's in for the sequels. Just as soon as she's invited:
Kathie Lee Gifford, Cheyenne Jackson-certified bitch and vocally miserable co-host of the fourth hour of Today, was in rare form again this morning. Discussing a performance of Etta James's "At Last" by Beyoncé in the earlier, non-farm-league portion of the broadcast (and surrounded by half-empty wine bottles, as if that really bears mentioning), Green-Eyed Monster Gifford expanded her 20-foot demon wingspan before launching into her own version of the song. Co-host Hoda Kotb responded by giggling nervously, as if to say, "Yes, just like that, Kathie Lee, but—you know—less dried-out, desperate, and utterly soulless." Gifford then launched right into what she does best: complaining. "You thought there was action up above?" she segued into her gripe-of-the-minute. "Well, down below, in the anals of Rockefeller Center—her...guy wouldn't let me in!" Sasha Fierce—we don't know who your bodyguard is, but we think you owe him a performance bonus for keeping the backstage bowels Kathie Lee-free. [Today]
Hollywood PrivacyWatch: 11/24 — At the Arclight, JANICE DICKINSON and her live-in man (?) TOMMY FRY took in a screening of Synecdoche, New York. Surprisingly, Dickinson seemed to enjoy pretty much the entire thing, her trademark cackle echoing now and then through the mostly-empty theater, usually whenever there was poo onscreen, which was often. [Hollywood PrivacyWatch is written by and for Defamer readers; send your sightings to tips@defamer.com.]
Welcome back to a special holiday edition of Defamer Attractions, your weekly guide to everything new, noteworthy and/or stillborn at the movies. And this Thanksgiving, we're grateful for a slate of Wednesday releases granting us a reprieve from another day of Twilight chatter. Not that any of them will surmount last week's blockbuster, but we have a quick and dirty forecast for long weekend's hits, sleepers and subplots, including a glimpse at the biggest disappointment and underdog to come. As always, our opinions are our own, but are easy to bake for that last-minute dessert idea. The full recipe is after the jump.WHAT'S NEW: Speaking of recipes, Four Christmases sure has a fresh one! Mix Reese Witherspoon and Vince Vaughn. Add two cups of diced ensemble players including Robrt Duvall, Jon Favreau, Kristin Chenoweth and Sissy Spacek. Flavor with ball-kicking, pratfall and baby-vomit jokes. Bake for two hours. Serve lukewarm. It's good for about $40 million over five days. Transporter 2 is a little simpler hors d'oeurve for the guys out there, with Jason Statham liberally seasoned with bullets, quick cuts and decibels, turning out $18 million before the main course on DVD. But if you're allergic to the multiplex, you may be best best suited to skip ahead to this week's new home video releases; the art-house kitchen appears to be closed to deliveries for the holiday weekend. THE BIG LOSER: Australia is almost three hours' worth of the expansive (and expensive, at $130 million) hisorical epic no one makes anymore. And despite Oprah Winfrey's lavish endorsement, there's a reason for that: It's one in a generation that actually finds any traction in the two female quadrants whose repeat viewings push it toward box-office longevity and, almost necessarily, Oscar luster. Fox needs half a Titanic here (thus its Hugh Jackman heartthrob push at non-starter Nicole Kidman's expense) to make this work, and for the sake of the studio and director Baz Luhrmann and all involved, we hope they get it. But the middling, $26 million reality — especially on Twilight's likely second week at No. 1 — is what it is.
· If a dog isn't coming on the Today Show to chew on Al Roker's junk, then it's there to kick his ass at golf. Time to book some cats, Al. · Wow! Liz Smith's new ghostwriter sure knows a heck of a lot about Madonna and Guy Ritchie · Sorry, folks, but celebrity bloggers aren't putting up with your shit anymore. · Pete Wentz fired back at critics of his newborn son's name: "You're like, you know what: I don't think anyone really has the real story." Translation: "Between Disney and BMW alone, do you know how much we made in naming rights last week?" · Hey, RoboCop on a unicorn!
