We already thought that Super Bowl watchers in Tucson were the luckiest fans ever, what with the free porn that briefly graced their televisions. Now, they're getting paid to have watched it.

Kidding! It's rhetorical! Clearly it's not such a slow news day that we would actually contrive to ask that question, right? Right. But someone would — you get one guess who.

After a glowing NYT write-up and a new night of the week, we're hoping Life starts to see better ratings. Sadly, the boost from Knight Rider dissolves quickly in American Idol's jetwash.

To save the homeless, David Archuleta doffs jeans. [Us]

Dazzling locals on the South American leg of his Valkyrie promotional tour, Tom Cruise unveiled a lean physique and taut set of abdominal muscles poolside in Rio de Janeiro.

Here are two things you should know about Eric Balfour: he has a knack for getting television shows canceled, and he will bare his NSFW ass for strangers on the street if you ask nicely.

If you couldn't wait for Catherine Hardwicke's candid expose detailing her rise and fall from Twilight glory, well, we're sorry. Twilight: Director's Notebook probably isn't it.

On part one of Idol Hollywood Week, hopeful after hopeful took to the Kodak Theatre stage for what Simon Cowell described without a shred of facetiousness as "the most important day of your lives."

Sure, it seems like a good idea for the Emmys to expand their acting and series nominations from five to six (as the TV Academy announced they will today). Here's what will happen, though.

Paramount probably could have lived with Jon Stewart's slobbering praise for Slumdog Millionaire last night on The Daily Show. If only it had stopped there.

Maybe Fox actually does want people to watch Dollhouse! After putting together a novel ad for the troubled Joss Whedon project, Fox has pulled out all the stops (and the clothes off star Eliza Dushku).

When you have the Oscar essentially locked up in your nominated category, you can try many more intriguing gambles with your campaigning. Take Penélope Cruz for NSFW example.

We hate to admit that we've listened to Christian Bale's tirade in its various forms so many times, it now comes off sounding like perfectly level-headed discourse, oooh goood you fucking little pricks.

The Jonas Brothers are nothing if not high-concept, making their ambitious plot to recruit down-on-his-luck auteur Baz Luhrmann the kind of cinch everyone can agree on.

An Annie Leibovitz Hollywood Portfolio graces VanityFair.com—a drab series of portraits depicting directors and their muses that's mostly forgettable, save for one that ickily superimposes Heath Ledger into a frame with Christopher Nolan.

1/31 — Was at the Bar Marmont and saw JASON SEGEL, he looked like he was on a date with an unidentified cute blonde. They sat cuddling in a corner, he seemed very interested in the conversation they were having, and even more interested in downing drinks. He seemed friendly as fans came up to him and asked for pictures. Isn't he supposed to be dating Drew Barrymore? Guess not! [Hollywood PrivacyWatch is written by and for Defamer readers; send your sightings to tips@defamer.com.]

· Al Pacino will star in a movie of King Lear. If they get DeNiro for Cordelia, this could turn out to be the electrifying Heat re-teaming that Righteous Kill never quite mustered. [Variety]

No wonder Alan Rosenberg's rejected restraining-order appeal yesterday included a few errors: Any lawyer moving to SAG squabbles from a career in right-wing crisis management would encounter a severe learning curve at some point.

Yes, that beautiful, glamorous woman pictured is none other than Jude Law, whose new look suddenly precludes him from playing nanny to his children, lest he be moved to have an affair with himself.

Having second-guessed his nearly disastrous decision to squeeze into a spandex battlesuit (as Oscar-poisonous as a latex fatsuit) and climb into the Wrestlemania ring, Mickey Rourke is now onto stop #2 of his redemption tour: