When real estate broker-to-the-stars Linda Stein was murdered in 2007, her "posh" 18th-floor condo at 965 Fifth Avenue was valued at $2.5 to $4.0 million. Oh, what a vicious homicide and recession will do to property prices. When the apartment was finally sold in August 2008, it went for just $1.045 million. Five months later, the condo is back on the market, but it's now being marketed as "staff quarters," a $1.8 million optional accessory to a $19 million penthouse in the building that's also up for sale. And you were thinking the lesson of the Linda Stein saga was to keep the help as far away from your apartment as possible. [Curbed]

• You can't afford to eat there any more, but you'll be pleased to hear that Daniel is still a four-star restaurant, according to Frank Bruni, who says Adam Tihany's recent redesign is "genuinely gorgeous." [NYT]
• Jason Pomeranc's Thompson LES is opening a rooftop bar. [GS]
• Gramercy Tavern gives away free $24.07 gift cards, chaos ensues. [GS]
• Chocolate Bar is re-opening at a new location in the West Village. [NYO]
• Kevin Adey is taking over as chef at Park Slope's Bussaco. [TONY]
• Your Tony Bourdain rant o' the day: "Alice Waters annoys the living shit out of me... There's something very Khmer Rouge about [her]." [DCist via Eater]
• Spotted: Adam Platt's photo appears in Conde Nast Traveler. [Eater]

With banking stocks caught in a downward spiral, there's a wonderful way for bank CEOs to both demonstrate confidence in the institutions they lead and one-up their rivals: Just buy a lot of stock in your own company! Following the news earlier today that Bank of America CEO Ken Lewis plunked down $1.2 million for 200,000 shares of BoA, JPMorgan's Jamie Dimon has now officially upstaged him by purchasing 500,000 shares in his bank for $11 million. Your turn, Vikram! [Clusterstock]

Want to entertain attendees at your next Rotary Club luncheon with amusing anecdotes about the disastrous war in Iraq, the mismanagement of US foreign policy, and the crumbling of diplomatic relations with countless foreign nations? Glad to hear it, since just hours after the inauguration, Condoleezza Rice signed with William Morris "to pursue opportunities that will likely include books and lectures." [Variety]

Kenneth Cole Billboard Pays Tribute to US Airways Flight 1549 [WCBS]

What happens when your plan to run for mayor is disrupted by a change to term limit laws, and then the other job you really wanted—a sweet cabinet postion in the Obama administration—doesn't pan out? You take over as Citigroup's new chairman, of course! The beleaguered bank announced this afternoon that Dick Parsons will take over for Win Bischoff as Citi's chair on February 23rd—assuming, of course, that the bank is still in existence by then. The good news for Citigroup shareholders? Given the bank doesn't have any money and no one is particularly interested in buying it, it's unlikely Parsons will preside over another disastrous $182 billion merger, only to dismantle it a few years later.

Previously: Bernie Madoff Guided Tour, Stop #17

Richard Johnson and Jason Binn celebrated their birthdays with a joint bash at Da Silvano on Monday night, where they were joined by their wives, Sessa von Richthofen and Haley Binn, along with guests like Donny Deutsch, Jared Kushner, Brooke Shields and Chris Henchy, Silvano and Marisa Marchetto, Ann Dexter-Jones, Lauren and Charlie Walk, Daniel Benedict, Jane and Richie Notar, Jerry Della Femina and Judy Licht, Beth Ostrosky, Amy Nederlander, Alina Cho, jewelry exec Benny Shabtai, Sharon Dorram, film producer Meryl Poster, and Gigi Stone of ABC News. [PMc, GoaG]

We'll excuse you if you forgot that the Sundance Film Festival is taking place right now. Whether it's because of the recession or those scene-stealers in Washington who've been hogging the spotlight this week, this year's fest will likely go down as one of the most low-profile in recent memory. The first batch of events this past weekend turned out to be a disappointment to celeb spotters (unless you count the occasional glimpse of people like Denise Richards and Ron Jeremy, that is). And the situation didn't improve yesterday when Park City turned into a ghost town as important people jumped on jets to head to Washington and the less fortunate had to make do with watching the historic event on TV. (Pity the photogs: The dearth of A-listers, reports VF, sent "errant packs of TMZ reporters scrambling for a celebrity sighting that was nowhere to be had.")

Is it because there's a recession going on, or because the Times' Eric Wilson believes that nothing in the world is more important than cosmetics and skincare, that he's so very surprised about the absence of rioting in the streets yesterday morning, when department stores were giving away products in recompense for price-fixing? "The strangest thing about the scene in front of Bloomingdale's," he writes, "... was that there was no scene." Eerie! After all, why wouldn't you want to trek out in the snow for strictly one tube of mascara or jar of skin cream per customer, especially as nothing else important was going on?

• The broadcast of yesterday's inauguration earned the highest ratings since Reagan took the oath in 1981. Early numbers from Nielsen indicate 29% of US households tuned in. That figure doesn't factor in the people who viewed it online, and the big event in DC yesterday set web traffic records, too. [THR, NYT]
• The Wall Street Journal received a dozen envelopes filled with a mysterious white powder today. [WSJ]
• Maria Bartiromo has signed a new contract with CNBC. [NYP]
• Newsday editor John Mancini has returned to work following a dispute with the paper's owner, Cablevision's Jim Dolan. [Newsday, E&P]
• Clear Channel is laying off 9% of its work force. [AdAge]
• People pushed back its Tuesday afternoon deadline to Wednesday so it could publish a special double issue with Obama on the cover. [WWD]
• North Korea's news agency didn't bother to report the inauguration until late yesterday afternoon. The article was three sentences long. [FB]

Grim news for residents of Greenwich: Real estate prices plunged the most in three decades in 2008—the median home price fell 7 percent—and the number of houses sold dropped by more than a third as the financial crisis roiled the finance-heavy suburb. Billionaire hedge fund manager Steve Cohen isn't selling his 31,642-square-foot, nine-bedroom palace, as far as we know. But if he were going to do so, it's safe to say having a 6,734-square-foot ice skating rink on your property isn't worth as much as it once was. [NYP]

Diane von Furstenberg was in Washington yesterday for the inauguration (who wasn't?) and says the experience gave her the "feeling that something major is happening." You think? Diane wasn't there alone, though. André Leon Talley served as her "chaperone," and she reports that ALT happens to be "a big star" with Obama fans. "People are constantly stopping him to pose for pictures... he complains a lot, but I am sure deep down he is happy." Just imagine how unhappy he'd have been if no one had noticed him at all! [DVF]

Olivia Palermo, the tonged-haired, copiously-kohl-rimmed 22-year-old whose turn on The City has showcased at least ten gradations of bitchface, has achieved the kind of fame that every aspiring social with narcissistic personality disorder dreams of: According to the Post, she's the most-searched name on New York Social Diary and the New York Observer's site (oh, and look where she is here), she's "rumored" (by whom? Her publicist?) to be the model for Gossip Girl's Blair Waldorf, and all the other attention-seeking party girls must be, like, sooo jealous of her.

File this under things you didn't wake up this morning needing to know. Julie Imperiali, Nicolas Sarkozy's personal trainer, says she was hired by Carla Bruni last year to help the French president shed weight and improve his sexual stamina. The workout plan focuses "on the perinea muscles at the bottom of the pelvis," a regimen that addresses "problems of premature ejaculation." Glad to hear Sarkozy is getting the therapy needed to keep Carla a very happy first lady. And at least Michelle now knows who to contact if Barack's new job starts interferring with his performance in the White House's master bedroom. [NYP]

It's been nothing but bad news for Giuseppe Cipriani these past few months and the family will face off in court against Rainbow Room landlord Tishman Speyer later this month. One person who probably won't be putting in a good word with the judge: Bloomberg food critic Ryan Sutton, who is so outraged by his recent "crummy three-course dinner for two" that cost $513 ($621 when you factor in the drinks) that he says that "the Ciprianis should be banished from the Rainbow Room." Also? "They should apologize for desecrating one of Manhattan's great sky-high vistas with sky-high prices for airline food. [Bloomberg]

Society chronicler David Patrick Columbia can't quite put his finger on it. Something is clearly different about Barack Obama. But what is it? He's just not sure! "I don't know if it's me, but he doesn't look like any other Presidents in memory. First of all he looks like a kid (although a mature one). That's probably because he's wiry. And he looks more like a college lecturer than a man who’s been wheeling and dealing among the wheelers and dealers of backroom politics." Yea, and he's also black. Try saying it aloud a few times. You'll get the hang of it eventually! [NYSD]

The emotional devastation caused by the recession, by careers imploding or nest-eggs disappearing, is often of a magnitude that requires professional help. But supposing you can't afford therapy? Luckily, Time is your substitute shrink this morning, and even better, its advice is quick, simple, and doesn't require sitting/lying in a small room for a hour a week. In a nutshell: You have permission to be sad, because sad people shop more and that's what the economy needs; you have permission to be mad, because angry people take risks and risky behavior is what makes this country great. (Let's perhaps not examine that part too closely.) Finally, you are strictly forbidden from being scared, you coward, because fear fosters inaction and pessimism. Basically, consider Alec Baldwin your role model and the country will be back in its feet before Barack has finished redecorating the Oval Office.

Forget the pundits, wonks, blowhard analysts and media commentators: In order to get some real insight into our new political era and what it may bring, let's consider the constellations of planets millions of miles from earth! Indian astrologer Bejan Daruwala, for example, predicts that Barack Obama, who is a Leo—he was born on August 4th, a birthday he shares with these people—will usher in peace and prosperity, and restore America's reputation with foreign nations.

• Want to share an elevator with Rupert Murdoch? Today is your lucky day. Les Wexner, the CEO of Limited Brands (and onetime mentor to Jeffrey Epstein), has "discreetly" listed his five-bedroom apartment at 834 Fifth Avenue for $60 million with brokers Serena Boardman and Larry Kaiser. Wexner and his wife Abigail originally purchased the co-op in "fixer-upper" condition for $9 million back in 1997. [NYO]
• Christopher Pesce, a managing director at Steve Schwarzman's Blackstone Group and the former global head of prime brokerage at Bank of America, has paid $6.3 million for a condo at 101 Warren Street in Tribeca. [Cityfile]
• Who says the Hamptons real estate market is dead? John Veronis, a co-founder of the boutique merchant bank Veronis Suhler Stevenson, has sold his six-bedroom, oceanfront home on Meadow Lane in Southampton for $27 million. [Newsday]