Corporations, Tending to a Tattered Image, Clip Wings of Private Jets [NYT]

As dismaying as it is when environmentalists' paranoid doom-mongering is shown to have some basis in reality, a new study has revealed that exposure to "perfluorinated chemicals" can cause fertility problems. PFCs are also found in various products including non-stick pans, face creams, shampoo, and nail polish. The obvious solution? Don't ever cook for yourself, seek out safer, more eco-friendly beauty products, and if that means boosting the income of Kate Hudson, well, we'll all just have to learn to live with that. [Bloomberg]

Two weeks ago, we pointed out one of the most ridiculous things that embattled Citigroup was spending money on as the bank struggled to remain solvent: the collection of fantastic perks being doled out to Sandy Weill, the company's former chairman and chief executive, a retirement package that included trips on the Citi jet, a full-time car and driver, and a 10-year lease on office space in the GM building. Today we take our hat off to Weill: The Post reports that he's given it all up. The company announced yesterday that Citi and Weill "mutually agreed to end those benefits in April 2009." [NYP]

Could stress and anxiety over the state of the economy explain why so many celebrity chefs are getting a bit belligerent as of late? Anthony Bourdain went out of his way to launch a verbal assault on Alice Waters recently. And the war between Mario Batali and Gordon Ramsay has been heating up in recent days, too. Apparently, Batali made some critical comments about the Hell's Kitchen star more than a year ago, a move that prompted Ramsay to start calling Batali "fanta pants" in honor of the orange shorts he's long been fond of.

We know: Every night you climb into bed between boring, regular sheets and think to yourself, when will I be able to buy bedding that not only keeps me comfortable while I sleep, but also makes me younger, prettier, and healthier? Thankfully, enterprising manufacturers have been laboring away on your behalf and now, reports the Times, there are all manner of ridiculous substances woven into pillowcases, sheets, and mattresses.

Legal eagle Rick Kurnit's take on Virgin America's decision to sue a website for its Flight 1549-inspired parody? He's thinking it's all an elaborate publicity stunt. "Virgin America sues [the site] to say they disavow unfair and tasteless advertising while drawing attention to itself at the same time and the fact a competitor had birds fly into their engine." My, that Richard Branson is a devious one, isn't he? [Brandweek]

• Democratic fundraisers Carl Spielvogel and Barbaralee Diamonstein-Spielvogel sold their seventh-floor apartment at 720 Park to ex-Merrill Lynch banker Peter Kraus in December for $36.63 million. But it looks like they won't be moving far. The Spielvogels have now paid $8.98 million for a second-floor apartment in the same building. The couple bought their latest co-op from the estate of the late Cynthia Phipps, a horse breeder and philanthropist who died in 2007. [Cityfile]
• A four-bedroom duplex at 740 Park, which was first offered for $35 million by heirs to the late Randolph L. Speight, is now $26 million. [NYO, Sotheby's]
• Attorney and real estate investor Alan Schnurman has slashed the price of his 41-acre property in Sagaponack by 27 percent. Once on the market for $64.5 million, it's now down to $47 million. [Newsday, Corcoran]

Oprah Winfrey is turning 55 today. Writer/director Ed Burns is turning 41. Heather Graham is 39. Athina Roussel—the daughter of Christina Onassis and only living heir of Aristotle—is 24. Top cardiothoracic surgeon David Adams is 52. Tommy Ramone is 57. Actor Nicholas Turturro turns 47. Actress Sara Gilbert is turning 34. And Tom Selleck celebrates his 64th birthday today.

• JPMorgan had concerns about Bernie Madoff this fall and decided to pull its own money from Madoff's fund. Why didn't the bank inform its clients? [NYT]
• Andrew Cuomo plans to expand the scope of his investigation into the bonuses paid by Merrill Lynch. [WSJ]
• BofA is planning to defer bonus payments to some staff this year. [FT]
• UBS has cut its bonus pool for 2008 by more than 80 percent. [BN]
• Wall Street bonuses totaled $18.4 billion in 2008, down from about $33 billion in 2007. [NYT, BW]
• Last year will go down as the worst for new home sales since 1982. [WSJ]
• Ford reported a net loss of $5.9 billion for the fourth quarter. [CNN]
• Interested in a Bernie Madoff action figure? You're in luck. [Clusterstock]

• Times publisher Arthur Sulzberger Jr. has a girlfriend. Except it's not Caroline Kennedy as some have suggested. Sulzberger, who separated from his wife in March, is dating a "vivacious" lady named Helen Ward, who he met in Peru a year ago and who is separated from her husband, too. [P6]
• Jeremy Piven brought his cocktail waitress girlfriend to the SAG Awards on Sunday night, but the poor thing didn't even get to sit with him during the ceremony. [NYDN]
• Michael Lohan is asking fans of his daughter to help him free Lindsay of Samantha Ronson's "bondage." [NYDN]

Remember those controversial Calvin Klein commercials from the early '80s featuring Brooke Shields? The heroin chic ads with Kate Moss from the late '90s? How about last year's commercial for Calvin Klein Secret Obsession starring Eva Mendes, which was censored by the networks? It looks like the brand is returning to the usual tricks. WWD reports the new commercial for Calvin Klein Jeans "is so provocative it initially was banned from even late-night cable TV." Conveniently, the Steven Meisel creation will now be the "main attraction" when the company's new e-commerce site debuts on Friday. You can take a peek at the "banned" commercial below, but don't expect to see anything racier than what you'd find on your run-of-the-mill MTV reality show.

• Is the economy having an impact on spring couture season in Paris? No, says Karl Lagerfeld, it's just having an impact "on the conversation." [NYT]
• Other words to live by, courtesy of Mr. Lagerfeld: "Luxury is for the rich, not the nouveau riche." [SF]
• What's something you might be able to afford? Can we interest you in a $14 sundress by Taylor Swift? [NYM]
• Marc Jacobs disciple Peter Copping is in line to succeed Olivier Theyskens at Nina Ricci. [WWD]
• As you probably guessed, the Times didn't out Jason Wu after all. [J'bel]
• Scenes from Stockholm Fashion Week, in case you skipped it. [Pipeline]
• A report from the Japan Fashion Week in NYC show last night. [Pipeline]

There's been tons of coverage of Andre Balazs' new Standard hotel this week. (See here and here.) If you're too lazy to actually read—or you've been mispronouncing his last name and not giving it the Hungarian accent that it cries out for—perhaps this video of Andre discussing the property will satisfy your thirst for all things Balazsian. Or just skip over to Curbed for photos from the hotel's unfinished rooftop, where Balazs plans to install two venues, including a casual bar and a "more refined club." [Curbed]

Who says the magazine industry is doomed? The debut issue of Capital Style is coming out on February 23rd, and it promises to cover everything from "fashion" to "local boutiques" to "new trends" to "hot new restaurants." Okay, so it's only covering those subjects in Central Ohio. Whatever. We're totally taking this as positive news anyway. [Capital Style]

• The Cutting Room is hoping to re-open on Franklin Street. [Eater]
• Anthony Martignetti says he plans to close and revamp Bar Martignetti. [GS]
• Frank Bruni gives a single star to Cabrito in his Times review today, subtracting points for the eatery's "maddening" inconsistencies. [NYT]
• More on the "21" Club's decision to end its 79-year tie requirement. [NYT]
• John Doherty is stepping down as the Waldorf-Astoria's exec chef. [NRN]
• Keith McNally chats with the Observer about Morandi, Minetta Tavern, and the "pizzeria with a twist" he plans to open a year from now or so. [NYO]
• Are Wall Streeters really eating at McDonald's to save on food? Maybe! [NYP]
• Health commissioner Thomas Frieden's latest target? Salt! [NYT]

Unclaimed Funds Database [New York State Comptroller's Office]
Steve and Christine Schwarzman [Cityfile]

Those ladies who talked to the Times today about the horrific pain and sacrifice involved in dating men who work on Wall Street amid the recession? Yea, well, they just scored a book deal. Happy Wednesday, struggling novelists! [Fashionista]

Now we know why Starbucks was so quick to put its $45 million jet on the market yesterday. The company announced moments ago that it plans to cut nearly 7,000 employees and close an additional 300 stores. The company's CEO, Howard Schultz, also says he plans to take a steep pay cut; he'll now earn approximately $4 a month if you subtract out his benefits package, which is almost (but not quite!) enough to pay for a venti Frappuccino once a month. The Wall Street Journal has more here. Melissa Allison of the Seattle Times has more detail here on the company's efforts to sell off its jet.

What's your kid planning to do this summer? For a mere $5,000-$9,500, an outfit called University of Dreams guarantees it will score your kid an internship at Donna Karan, or you get your money back. Private yoga and Kabbalah sessions with Donna herself not included. [WSJ]

Michael Dell conferring with Nestlé board chairman Peter Brabeck-Letmathe at the World Economic Forum in Davos today. [Photo: Swiss Image]