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Fifty auditioners are in the running for "The Next Internet Millionaire." Since dot-com millionaire Joel Comm invited would-be millionaires to apply for a role on his show (competing for a $25,000 prize and a business gig), dozens of YouTube users have posted video auditions. But oh my god everyone, we have to save this show from being a boring contest between suit-wearing yawn-worthy business clones. Vote for these twelve characters to turn The Next Internet Millionaire into "Fear and Loathing on the Apprentice."

Joel Comm hired Toronto talk show host Heather Vale to co-host the show. Here she is in the show's second intro, not much more professional than the earlier one from Joel:

The offering may seem pitiful to anyone in Silicon Valley. Joel's business doesn't sound nearly as lucrative as the average startup, or nearly as much fun: his web sites and books center around AdSense, Chitika Mini-malls, and other dull ad schemes.

Still, plenty of people wanted a piece of Joel's action badly enough to send in a video audition. It's time to pick a dream team from the 50 remaining contestants. Here are Valleywag's favorites; vote for them here to pack the show with the best characters. Click someone's name to vote "10" and make them a star.


1. Andrea Yager brings sloppy do-gooderism and moderate good looks:


2. Gotta go with the guy from Costa Rica, Nico Pisani.


3. In the movie version, Bob Molton will be played by William H. Macy. Friendly, dorky, and addresses "Joel" over a dozen times:


4. Charles Trippy will be cast as the young hot one:


5. David Nguyen believes you are powerful! But he couldn't be bothered to shoot a second take after planes drowned out his monologue.


6. Danette Wallace is young hot one #2 and refreshingly normal.


7. Jason Marshall is doin' it for Jesus, a disabled boy, and his homemaker wife.


8. Did Sagar Mehta put captions under his rap video so we could understand what he's saying, or so we could sing along?


9. Best Musical Number goes to Jaime Luchuck:


10. Lou Riley had me from his bad opening rap.


11. Great-granddad Philip Dale Smith would make some fun multi-generational contrast.


12. Wouldn't it be fun to see William Sledd, the 23-year-old gay guy who wants to adopt a baby, spar with the conservative Christian? Classic reality show battle.

Nick Douglas writes for Valleywag and Look Shiny. He's an Internet Starving Artist.