"How Blonds Evolve," Reading File, Week in Review, Sunday:

This turned up in our inbox soon after the first State of the Times meeting finished this morning:

• Penguin wins auction for Alan Greenspan memoir with an offer believed to be nearly $9 million. Obligatory question: Irrationally exuberant? [NYP]
• The dude behind the allegedly forthcoming mags Everything for Men and Everything for Women is a con artist and a felon. Unlike most mag people, who are merely con artists. [WWD]
• Arthur S. holds his State of the Times meeting; reporters question why he gets paid so much and they so little. [Media Mob/NYO]
• ABC's Bob Woodruff reportedly now conscious and talking, though heavily medicated. [ABCNews.com]
• Air America could lose its New York affiliate on April 1. We'd be bummed, if we ever listened to it. [NYP]
• The Jew and the gays brought Oscar his second-worst ratings since 1987. [WP]
• Does Diane Sawyer want to anchor World News Tonight? One gossip site says so. [TMZ]
• Candace Bushnell to launch weekly Sirius Satellite Radio show giving advice to women. First piece of advice we'd like her fans to hear: "They're just cupcakes. Stop waiting on a line around the corner for them." [NYDN]
• Will Nick Sylvester be a Stephen Glass, a Mike Barnicle, or a Janet Cooke? [Media Mob/NYO]

From an article today on a major revision to Janson, the definitive art-history textbook:

And we'd really appreciate if people would finally start recognizing and respecting our unique culture and heritage. Perhaps we can get a History Month?

• The latest in the Times' ever-growing stable of blogs is Wall Street and financial blog DealBook, edited by Andrew Ross Sorkin. We imagine that when Gawker alum Elizabeth Spiers gets her similar venture, Dealbreaker, up and running, these two will spend the spring mudwrestling one another. Kinda hot, no? [DealBook]
• Before you get all wet and saucy at the prospect of more pictures of Kate Moss blowing rails, keep in mind that these ones are from 1998 or so. And really, once you've seen her hoover one, you've seen her hoover them all. [Sun UK]
• Win yourself a free meal on 71 Clinton's last night of service. All you have to do is come up with the best answer to how you would spend $250 on food and drinks, in a single night, on the Lower East Side. If you want to win, we suggest refraining from mentioning Welcome to the Johnson's. [Eater]
• WASPdate continues to thrive, lending its support to plaid pants-wearing whiteys everywhere. [AM New York]
• New York mag puts out its Best of New York issue, and yet the "Best Way to Get on a Hipster Photo Website" strikes us as the worst of our fair city. [NYM]
• Frank Bruni gets highly philosophical on the issue of whether or not a restaurant should be re-reviewed. How one man puts so much thought into the star system, we'll never know. But bless him for all that he does. [Diner's Journal]

A reader points us toward a seemingly innocent Aston Martin V-8 story in yesterday's Times by writer Jerry Garrett that, for some reason, struck us as a little, um, inappropriate. Of course, it could be your typical dad/daughter/Aston Martin love essay, but it reads a little bawdy either way:

Because it's Friday, and because we know you like to sound smart:

It's amazing that it's been 15 years. But it must bring Mr. King great solace to know that in that time his dream has been realized: Everywhere across the world, we all can just get along.

Click to enlarge.

A Times correction:

• NYT's James Bennet is The Atlantic's new editor. We have nothing witty to say about this. [NYT]
• ABC anchor Bob Woodruff is making "good" progress in his recovery. No jokes here, either. [Newsday]
• Want to read early handicapping of the Pulitzer Prizes? Nor us. But someone must, right? [E&P]
• Jann Wenner shares a "hunk of meat" with Playboy CEO Christie Hefner and Time Inc. chair Ann Moore. We had no idea Matt Nye was so broadminded. [Mediaweek]
• Diversity Council's report terms Times "a newspaper at risk" on diversity issues. Hey, why should things be different on that issue than everywhere else? [Media Mob/NYO]
• Tuesday night, journalists talked about themselves. Obligatory mah-nishtanah joke here. [WWD (second item)]

When we received an email from Jenny Lee last night enquiring which of us was on the birthday beat, we answered honestly and then steeled ourselves for what we assumed would be the inevitable indignance. So you can imagine our surprise when her numerical name appeared in our inbox again moments later bearing not scorn but a gift. Herewith, the actual invitation to the four-city Jennifer 8. Lee 30th-birthday extravaganza, as delivered to invitees, and submitted by Ms. 8. Lee herself:

Oh, Miss K., we know it hurts, but any high-flying woman will find shopping in Los Angeles — specifically, at the hipper-than-thou Fred Segal boutiques — to be quite the reality check. Driving up in a rented Jaguar simply isn't going to do it:

Hoping for a chance to wish a happy birthday to your favorite numeraled reporter? Have we got good news for you today, then. The Jennifer 8. Lee 30th-birthday extravaganza will be making a four-stop U.S. tour. We hear from people fortunate enough to be invited that select friends, members of the Harvard-alumni Yahoo listserv, Times colleagues, man-daters, and Amandra Tree recently received a real, old-fashioned, paper invite on card stock, bearing on its front the image of a Chinese food container, chop sticks, and a fortune cookie and on the back this text:

• CBS Radio sues Howard Stern for using their air to promote his new Sirius show. So why didn't they just kick him off the air back then? "I'm the one who kept you on the air and I knew I could sue you afterwards," Stern says Les Moonves told him, presumably with an enormous, blindingly white smile. [NYT]
• Boston Globe in talks to print, distribute New York Post in Massachusetts. And finally New Englanders will have their hoped-for chance to play Post Poker. [BG]
• You know Nancy Grace, the crusading anchorwoman on CourtTV and Headline News? Yeah, well, she's kind of full of shit. [NYO]
• Bode Miller was Jim Kelly's second-worst cover decision, the Time editor, whose hindsight checks in at an amazing 20/15, tells Jon Friedman. [MW]
• NYT's Elisabeth Bumiller to write Condi bio; NYT's Steven Weisman, Bumiller's hubby, to get kicked off State Department beat. Such are the compromises of married life. [NYO]

Last January, the Observer conscientiously explained a potentially confusing bit of Times bylinology: Patrick D. Healey, then of the Albany bureau, was an accomplished recruit from The Boston Globe, where he'd been known simply as Patrick Healy; Patrick O'Gilfoil Healy was a recent grad in the intermediate-reporting program who in college had also been known simply as Patrick Healy. They were not the same person, nor were they related. (To further complicate matters: The latter is apparently known conversationally as Jack, which is his real first name.) But the point was that with this surfeit of Pat Healys, no one at the Times had the byline Patrick Healy.

Deep down, we all just want to be loved. Everyone. Even a bigshot New York Times writer with a weekly column and an Academy Awards blog and amusing new video clips and the freedom, it seems, to write about nearly whatever he wants, whenever he wants, from wherever he wants, for the world's leading newspaper — Mr. Run Amok, but in a good way — just wants to be loved.

Don't worry: Next week they'll be back to their usual trivial concerns, like whose turn it is to sit with Thomas at lunch.

A memo today from Times deputy managing editor Jon Landman, he of the famous "We have to stop Jayson from writing for the Times. Right now" messsage, announces some backed staffing changes at the paper. The guy who's been running the continuous news desk, Bill Brink, is moving over to be managing editor Play, the new sports mag, and also work on "rich web projects" during the lulls in the quarterly production sked. Jim Roberts becomes the new director of continuous news. But he'll be doing more than Brink did in that capacity, because apparently the Times now thinks this whole online-news thing might be worth paying attention to.