The Department of Justice announced today it's charged 72 people who allegedly traded child porn on a private message board called Dreamboard.

The National Film Preservation Foundation at the New Zealand Film Archive discovered the first three reels of the first film that famed suspense director Alfred Hitchcock worked on as an assistant director and art director.

Amazon.com really, really does not want to collect sales tax from its customers. But that's not just the online retailer's problem: If you work for Amazon, the tax obsession means you need permission to visit certain states, and might not be able to send certain emails when you get there. In some instances, you won't even be able to identify yourself as working for Amazon.com.

Prince William and Kate Middleton rub shoulders with normals. Katie Holmes barks like a dog. Samantha Ronson's mugshot is everything you hoped for. Paris Hilton and Brittny Gastineau have a party-off. Wednesday gossip keeps its toiletries in 3-oz. containers.

Deposed Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak appeared in court today to face charges of corruption and ordering the killing of unarmed protesters earlier this year. He was wheeled in on a hospital bed acting the part of a sad old man, along with his klepto scumbag sons, Gamal and Alaa. Hard times for the Mubaraks. So, in honor of Hosni's not so glorious return to Cairo, here's a quick look at the man in happier times.

Now that everyone's calmed down after last year's Four Loko craze, it's time for scientific research! Of 11 case studies, "one kid was found on the subway tracks, another was unconscious at school." Yup. Sounds about right.

West Reading, Pennsylvania police Sgt. Matthew Beighley has a thing for Tasers. Not long after becoming a certified Taser expert, Beighley zapped two fellow officers in March. He also Tasered his dad, and recorded it on his Blackberry. Here's how police investigators say the incident happened, from the Reading Eagle:

Finally, Oprah Winfrey will be publicly recognized for her various achievements. What took this long?! The Motion Picture Academy has just announced that the floundering basic cable mascot will receive the Jean Hersholt Humanitarian Award — an honorary Oscar awarded to "an individual in the motion picture industry whose humanitarian efforts have brought credit to the industry." And who has, uh, accredited Hollywood more that Winfrey has, selflessly donating thousands upon thousands of hours of precious airtime to needy friends like Julia Roberts and Tom Hanks to promote their totally shitty movies? No one! All hail Saint Oprah! (James Earl Jones is getting one, too.) [Reuters, photo via Getty]

Faye Dunaway is a much-feared resident of West Hollywood. That's pretty much common knowledge. Ask around a bit, and you're sure to hear a tale or two about the star of Mommie Dearest and Network terrorizing a Koo Koo Roo or holding an El Salvadorian car wash employee hostage with a barbecue lighter. And like any Norma Desmond worth her salt, Dunaway has more than a few skeletons squirreled away in her closet. Some of them are literal skeletons of Thai food delivery boys who'd forgotten her chicken satay. Others, however, are figurative skeletons — shadily held property holdings, for example, such as the one-bedroom walk-up on East 78th St. she's been calling her "primary residence" since 1994.

TV's favorite sexy uncle (ew? ew) is getting back in the leading man saddle. Also today: good news for Ana Gasteyer, godly news for Miley Cyrus, and Game of Thrones news for the rest of us dorks.

Claude Levi-Strauss is familiar to anyone who took Anthropology 101 as the most important anthropologist of the 20th century and a father of structuralism, the theoretical forebear to post-structuralism, post-modernism, deconstruction and all that weird subversive French philosophy your parents warned you about. Which may explain why the FBI spent close to a decade spying on him in the 1940s.

Saudi Prince Alwaleed bin Talal just couldn't stand being the 26th richest man in the world while Dubai had the world's tallest penis tower, the Burj Khalifa, which was renamed after a measly president, Khalifa bin Zayed Al Nahyan of the UAE. So, in honor of his manhood, the prince is building a bigger tower.

Yesterday Newt Gingrich laid out a new argument for why he should be the GOP presidential nominee: He's got the most Twitter followers. But according to a former Gingrich staffer, he bought them.

In your oppressive Monday media column: the Oprah to HuffPo career path, The New Yorker is digitally famous, the 48-hour magazine returns, PBS expands to England, and Peter Lauria goes to Reuters.

The 18-year-old arrested on Scotland's remote Shetland Islands for allegedly wreaking online havoc as the wisecracking spokesman for the hacking group Lulz Security was bailed out today. Jake Davis aka "Topiary" (we think!) emerged with his eyes well-shielded from the international spotlight.

If there was ever a way to truly gauge a presidential candidate's popularity among voters, it would be by the number of Twitter followers they have. And that's what historical fiction author Newt Gingrich is banking on. He cried to The Marietta Daily Journal about "the elite media" going after him, and referenced this story about his "personal touch" on Twitter:

You've probably wondered what happened to Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt from The Hills, haven't you? Well, The Daily Beast caught up with the two, who are now broke and living at Spencer's parents' house in Santa Barbara. Theirs is a sad, cautionary tale of two kids who get filthy rich for no real reason, act like complete assholes on television, and then regret everything when the money dries up.

Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. From the Kardashians in Los Angeles to Joe Jonas in Paris to Hugh Jackman in St. Tropez, here are some of the more amusing shots from the past week.

Why does Scarlett Johansson hate America's troops so much? She declined an invitation from a Marine Corps sergeant to attend the Marine Corps Ball.

James Murdoch, whose claim to Parliament last week that he had no idea there was rampant phone hacking going on at News International when he approved a $1.1 million settlement for a phone hacking case has since been contradicted by two of his executives, will probably be called back to explain the discrepancy.