Ah Bill O'Reilly. God bless him. Tonight he opened his show stating that Michael Jackson's family should be left alone and allowed to grieve. Naturally, he then turned right around and ripped Jackson to shreds for everything imaginable.

God bless Shepard Smith, every non-wingnut's favorite Fox News personality. Today he almost murdered a "fill-in director" with his eyes for not knowing how to correctly work the teleprompter or something.

Last night Glenn Beck's guest was ex-CIA person Michael Scheuer, who stated that the only hope for the country was for Osama Bin Laden to "deploy and detonate a major weapon in the United States." Seriously.

We've got a copy of Roger Friedman's $5 million complaint against News Corp. and Rupert Murdoch. When you sue someone for breach of contract, aren't you supposed to actually quote from the contract? Just asking!

Last night on Fox News, Geraldo Rivera took a hit out on David Earls, a convicted child-rapist whose atrociously low sentence Bill O'Reilly has been demagoguing.

Surely you're wondering what Glenn Beck was up to tonight, no? Oh, the usual, you know, insinuating that Barack Obama is a communist dictator because he condemned the military coup in Honduras, just like Fidel Castro and Hugo Chavez did.

Finally, a nice story. Little outre news outlet Fox News—which dares to be balanced and fair amid a sea of bias—is set to have its best ratings year yet. Boy, Obama sure has energized the frothing, angry Right!

• ABC and NBC will face off on Thursday night with competing tributes to Farrah Fawcett, who died today. But you probably expected that, no? [NYT]
• David Letterman beat out Conan in the ratings last week, the first time the Late Show has dominated the weekly ratings since 2005. [THR]
• Rosie O'Donnell will debut a new show on Sirius XM this fall. [NYDN]
• Rumor has it Ben Silverman's tenure at NBC may be ending soon. [DHD]
• Fox News now averages the same number of viewers as CNN, MSNBC, and HLN combined. Cue an evil grin across Roger Ailes's face. [THR]
• Wired editor-in-chief Chris Anderson's new book contains material he ripped from Wikipedia. But he's really, really sorry about it, okay? [NYP]

Fox News has been going the extra mile to break things down for its most simple-minded viewers. Last night Glenn Beck made crude drawings on a chalkboard, and tonight he and Bill O'Reilly used Barbie dolls to explain ACORN.

Confused about the situation in Iran, are you? Surely you've found yourself laying in bed at night recently wondering, "When will Glenn Beck explain all of this for me?" Well you're in luck—Glenn broke out the chalkboard today!

• New York Times reporter David Rohde, who was held hostage in Afghanistan for seven months, managed to escape on Friday night. The Taliban had reportedly been seeking $25-30 million in ransom; the newspaper, meanwhile, is rumored to have offered $5 million for his safe release. [NYT, AP, ABC, CQ]
• The negotiations in Boston continue: The Boston Globe and its largest union are close to an agreement on wage and benefit cuts. Or so they say. [BG]
• Ratings for The Fashion Show haven't been great (and Project Runway is fast approaching), but Bravo execs say they're pleased with the results. [NYT]
• Disney's The Proposal topped the box office this weekend, pulling in $34.1 million and knocking The Hangover into second place. [THR]

We finally met Bill O'Reilly's stalker-producer Jesse Watters on Saturday. It was a fleeting and civil encounter—jovial, even—but ultimately unsatisfying. We asked him some questions about his stalking, and then he drove away, because he's a coward.

At approximately 8:45 a.m. on Saturday, June 20, we ambushed Bill O'Reilly's stalker-producer Jesse Watters outside his home in Huntington, N.Y. Details and video will be up on Monday morning.

Doug Hampton, the cuckolded husband of Sen. John Ensign's mistress, wrote a letter to Fox News five days before the story broke that Ensign had ruined his life and career. Fox never reported it, and called Hampton an extortionist.

Blubbering controversialist and "real American" Glenn Beck has no reason to cry, which he fakes doing, all the time, to make money. According to Forbes, Beck made $23 million in the last 12 months.

Poor Griff Jenkins. He got all decked out in a tuxedo to harass whatever sort of Godless Americans attend ACORN conventions, only to get into a scuffle with one of those dang liberal bloggers, and we're all better for it!

We keep hearing more from people who once worked with Fox News writer Don Broderick. Even before he was accused of dragging a cyclist through Central Park, former colleagues tell us, co-workers were afraid to be around him.

Don Broderick, the Fox News Channel news writer accused of hitting a cyclist in Central Park earlier this month, dragging him four blocks, and fleeing the scene, has been arrested, according to an NYPD spokeswoman. Updated below

In your plastic Wednesday media column: Greta Van Susteren explains why she's a better friend to "poor African Americans" than Barack Obama is, along with newspaper news, TV news, and New York Post blowjob news.