Since the Disney Teen Idol Factory's Miley Cyrus model has developed a "slutty photos" malfunction, the company is ramping up the marketing on its male prototypes, The Jonas Brothers. Like Cyrus, the band has sold millions of albums but you probably can't name a single one of their songs unless you spend a lot of time around 12 year-old girls. According to The New York Times, the trio features none of Cyrus's dangerous hints of a sex drive.

· Anhedonic The Incredible Hulk star William Hurt brings his unparalleled work ethic to FX's Damages for his first-ever regular TV series role. [Variety]
· Live Free or Die Hard director Len Wiseman will helm the movie version of Gears of War, which he'll accomplish by pressing L2 while firing X repeatedly and holding down the triangle button. [Variety]
· Kevin Spacey will play a pothead "shrink to the stars" in Shrink. [Variety]
· SAG head Alan Rosenberg proposed an official debate with AFTRA, promising the most scintillating back-and-forth about online clip consent and jurisdiction over low-budget made-for-Internet productions in the history of inter-acting-guild debates. Yeah, this doesn't look good. [THR]
· ER added four more regular cast members to its upcoming final season. More characters=more deaths=more ratings! [THR]

If you found yourself skipping over to the fridge for a glass of O.J. feeling refreshingly sanguine this morning, we think we may know the reason why: Today marks the first day since the historic overturning of the gay marriage ban that same-sex couples could show up to any county clerks' office in the state to apply for a marriage license and, in most cases, tie the paisley knot. LAist has photos of the couple who started it all by challenging the ruling, and, fittingly, were first to benefit at a traditional Jewish ceremony held yesterday beneath an all-orientation-welcoming chupah. A reader sent in the above photo of George Takei and his—OMGay! Husband!—Brad Altman, who showed up bright and early to West Hollywood City Hall to collect their marriage license. Takei told reporters, "Today we are all here to give flesh and blood reality to that ruling. We are going to make history. Congratulations to all of us and may equality live long and prosper." Still, gay leaders are cautioning their people to buffer their enthusiasm, the LAT reports:

We're not sure if Variety editor Peter Bart has simply found his stride as a blogger after years of loathing the medium or if his recent dispatch about the new HBO documentary Heidi Fleiss: The Would-Be Madam of Crystal simply shilled a little too hard to make it as a print story. BUT! Either way, we are more than a little intrigued by Fleiss's latest predicament, the latest in what HBO Docs boss Sheila Nevins calls the "opera" that is the former madam's life:

[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

When Bertolt Brecht said, "Art is not a mirror held up to reality but a hammer with which to shape it," well, he was just being an egomaniacal auteur. But it's quite possible that he was right — if you're willing to classify network television as art, that is. Consider the case of two recent seemingly unthinkable societal shifts — Barack Obama's presidential nomination and the recent decision to legalize gay marriage in California starting today. Both were the plots of popular television shows before they actually happened. Could the paranoid social conservatives be right? Does what people see on TV actually change their opinions? Do Kiefer Sutherland's powers of persuasion extend beyond Defamer? Consider the evidence after the jump.

It was a high-profile relationship that was difficult to reconcile: perennial Hollywood good girl and honorary bear icon Anne Hathaway to "bad boy" paramour Raffaello Follieri, an oily entrepreneur linked to a string of shady business transactions that culminated recently in his charitable foundation coming under investigation by the New York State Attorney General's Office. Now, reports the Daily Mail, having experienced the comparative bliss of having exchanged potentially infectious bodily fluids with a total non-charity-swindling-dirtbag like Steve Carell, Hathaway has finally pulled away:

We'd seen this in bits and pieces since its Sundance premiere this year, but an incidental reminder in our inbox just prompted another visit to Isabella Rossellini's short-film series Green Porno. And under the influence of head-clearing morning air, it occurred to us that Rossellini's episodic forays into the reproductive lives of snails, earthworms, spiders and other bugs features not only among the most sickly prurient puppetry we've seen in years, but arguably the best work the actress has done in almost two decades. Porno's backers at Sundance Channel will tell you all about their pro-ecology mandate, but honestly, we could take or leave such shameless earnestness in the face of a bug-fucking resurgence like this. Follow the jump to view our favorite episode, Preying Mantis, whose misspelling makes all the sense in the world once its grotesquerie of oozing, carnal head-eating settles in. We'll never have sex again. [Sundance Channel via VSL]

It seems life's only kind of a bitch for Eric Eisner, the upstart producer, son of Michael and brief profile subject in the new issue of Portfolio. On one hand, he's positioned to profit further from his producing debut, Hamlet 2, which sold at Sundance in January for $10 million and opens theatrically in August; then there's the whole Barry Diller-mentor thing and the handy commutes on Dad's private jet. Alas, he and fiancee Stacey Bendet received congratulatory pastries addressed to "STACEY AND MICHAEL," and worse yet, there is still no good news to report on Eisner's missing (and feared murdered) producing partner Leonid Rozhetskin.

Billy Ray Cyrus, virtue-hoarding father and achy-breaky-svengali to cultural tween phenomenon Miley Cyrus, appeared on The Today Show this morning, where for the first time he was made to address the now-infamous Virgin Miley study that recently graced the pages of Vanity Fair. An unwavering Meredith Vieira was determined to figure out where he was as photographer Annie Leibovitz crouched beneath a lighting umbrella, pressing two index fingers to her lips as she spitballed aloud, "For the next one, maybe lose the clothes, clutch that sheet to your chest, and give me your best 'Got Milk?' face."

· Thanks to a visit from Snoop, Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson will never again have to second-guess the correct temperature for their baby's malt-liquor formula. [TRL]
· So according to Paris Las Vegas Rules, Lindsay, Samantha, and the Entourage boys count as a full house. [Gawker]
· We feel compelled to somehow touch upon last night's Tony Awards, so here's a gallery of stars in attendance. If Mandy Patinkin isn't playing Johannes Brahms in some musical, then we're concerned he might have let himself go. [bestweekever.tv]
· Martha Stewart has seen Paul Newman, and thinks he looks "a little thinner," but "absolutely fine," and his salad dressing, "tastes a little synthetic and chemically for my tastes." [ET Online]
·Goats for sale! Really, really weird looking goats for sale! [israelforum.com via BoingBoing]

Ah, Father's Day. A day when all of us, rich and poor, famous and anonymous, get together with our families and try to keep our long simmering resentments from boiling over. Kevin Federline celebrated the holiday like so many others, in a kid-free Las Vegas nightclub. Naturally,Federline nabbed a Father of the Year Award at club Prive. In an item that is layered with "WTF?" Us Magazine magazine attempts to explain the inexplicable.

While we normally don't like to dredge up memories of the dark, dreary Writers Strike days, Molly McAleer has a score she'd like to settle. You see, Molls went out and bought a prom dress in hopes of attending the Ben Silverman High Winter Prom. Alas, the prom never came to fruition and now, a good five months later, Molls is still feeling very Andie Walsh about the whole thing. Hear her reasons why the prom would've ruled after the jump.

Panic broke out at the OneXOne gala Saturday night in Calgary, when a group of African schoolchildren wearing traditional garb and posing sweetly for the cameras were sent fleeing for their lives as charity-spokesperson Ben Affleck plunged his face—"Like nothing I have ever seen!" one was later quoted as saying, "It was the size of five regular-man's heads!"—into the shot. Once order had been restored, the frightened boys were reintroduced to the star, whose work they were unfamiliar with ("Gone Baby Gone? National Board of Review winner for best director? No? What about Armageddon? They must have that one at Africa Blockbuster?").

Temperamental and/or difficult actors are nothing new, of course, but as alluded to earlier today in our glimpse at the new-and-slightly-spiritually-improved Mike Myers, it takes a special kind of difficult to make the "stroppy" cut. To wit, does your rep for tantrums, whining and/or demanding final cut equal or exceed your rep for such actions making your films better? Then you might be headed for the All-Strop Team, as laid out today by Guardian contributor Andrea Hubert: Folks like Edward Norton (the captain), Eddie Murphy (the leadoff hitter, if only for knowing when to take a walk on Pluto Nash), Gwyneth Paltrow (the cleanup hitter, for publicly referring to her film View From the Top as View From My Ass) and others.

A new book of photography called Crying Men contains portraits of some of the most respected and accomplished male movie stars of our era, engaged in the kind of emasculating waterworks we're all taught from a very young age is better suited to those who obsesses about designer shoes and tap their feelings out into a computer. ("Later that day I got to thinking about shows of emotion etc etc...") How did photographer Sam Taylor-Wood elicit these moments of raw vulnerability from her subjects? In some cases, such as in the portrait of Hayden Christiansen above, it was as simple as reading the actor selections from a number of Jumper reviews. Others were not so easy. From the publisher's website:

Apparently Denise Richards' life of collecting alimony and contemplating posing for Playboy is so busy that she requires a full staff to function. In this week's episode of It's Complicated, she upbraids her two warring assistants about some clothes she had borrowed that were supposed to be returned but hadn't. To Denise, it's an issue of integrity. Much to our surprise, she managed to utter the word "integrity" without being struck by lightning.

[Photo Credit: Flynet]

As we’ve learned on our first few voyages into the Living Lohan household, where Dina Lohan knows best and familial ties do not exempt you from abiding by her all-knowing wrath, the multi-tasking Momager extraordinaire proved her managerial skills outstandingly in last night’s episode. The Other Lohan, the surfer-haired preteen brother whose dismal fate has been shoved to the side the more worried and concerned we become following rising rap star Ali’s increasingly deafening fits of rage, had his first shot at some real camera time during this episode. And despite Dina’s obvious disinterest in her son’s career prospects (that is, until he hits puberty and his marketing appeal among tweenybop girls increases exponentially), the queen of the house does find time to throw cash at the problem. Low-prioritized Cody-centric tasks include hiring a token age-equivalent friend, halfheartedly attempting to include him in yet another Ali photo spread, and feigning concern for all three moneymakers children during whiny, crocodile tear-filled cries for help aimed at Tough Love Lohan grandmatriarch, Ann Sullivan. Our picks for Dina’s three most inspiring parenting lessons from last evening’s half-hour are:

Nothing suggests a good week to come like the Catholic Church calling out "godless" Hollywood — or, more specifically, rebuking Tom Hanks and the rest of the fork-tongued heathens who had requested access to shoot parts of Angels and Demons in a few of Rome's celebrated cathedrals. The Vatican apparently has yet to get over the whole Jesus-was-married thing from The Da Vinci Code, and the part in Angels and Demons when Hanks's Robert Langdon arrives at Santa Maria della Vittoria "to find a cardinal being set on fire" doesn't seem to help matters: