A "mischievous magician" and his two assistants are reportedly in police custody in southwestern Colombia after a "mass hypnosis" session that led to the hospitalization of 75 schoolchildren, according to a regional radio station. Parents of the afflicted students of the Institución Educativa Ciudad Mocoa have asked authorities to allow the magician to visit the hospital, so he can release the children from the trance.

Joran van der Sloot, the longtime main suspect in the 2005 disappearance of American student Natalee Holloway in Aruba, has been officially charged with murder in the death of Stephany Flores, who was murdered in Peru last year.

If the second-most powerful official in New York City government spends two days in jail for assaulting his wife, is that something the Bloomberg administration thinks people ought to know about? Nope.

Arid Uka, a 21 year-old from Kosovo, has confessed to the March shooting of four U.S. soldiers at the Frankfurt airport, which left two of the soldiers dead. Uka says he was "blinded" by "lies and propaganda."

Legendary cross-dressing Jamaican drug lord Christopher "Dudus" Coke, who was extradited to New York after setting off a bloody neighborhood drug war in Jamaica, yesterday pleaded guilty to racketeering charges and now faces just 23 years in jail instead of a possible life sentence for a lifetime's worth of scumbaggery. We'll probably never know more about the pink wig.

Urban Dictionary has become an invaluable internet resource for anyone looking to crack the ever-evolving slanguage of the streets. Where else can you learn the difference between a "pink pancake" and a "Belgium biscuit," while picking up a handy term for that thing where you Facebook request someone you just met at a party, all in a single visit? Now even the po-po have gotten jiggy to its 411, or whatever.

It's pretty easy to spot German tourists in Las Vegas, as they're usually the ones in socks and sandals occupying the buffet lines at the Paris. But one recent German visitor to America's vice capital left with a bellyful of something else entirely: blow.

A man in Hamilton, Ohio, was arrested on Sunday when he got caught humping a pink plastic pool raft in an alleyway behind a Dumpster. Oh, and this wasn't Edwin Tobergta's first arrest for the same offense either. He apparently has a plastic fetish!

Throwing your annoying kid off a barge isn't funny. Explaining why you threw your kid off a barge, however, is a great opportunity for jokes! Here is Sloan Briles, the Californian charged with felony child endangerment after throwing his 7-year-old off a sightseeing boat, explaining himself to a local news station.

At London's Notting Hill Carnival on Monday, 20 year-old Rio Andre was stabbed by a teenager after trying to break up a fight. What was that intense moment like? Well, just look at this god damn picture: There's Andre in the middle of the scene with his wound, arms out, looking stricken; there's the stabber, fleeing the scene with knife in hand; there's the heroic bystander trying to trip the perp as he runs by; there are the police, frozen, like "huh?"; there's the crowd in the background, shocked.

Police in Yorktown, Virginia responded to a domestic dispute call around 10:00 a.m. on Thursday that resulted in a man decapitating himself. Yes, that's right. He decapitated himself.

You'd think a professional chef who is also a cannibal would be into some ambitious human meat food, right? Nope! A 21-year-old Russian cook and (now-jailed) cannibal settled for some boring old meatballs and sausages.

Is there any kind of crime better than the crime you can imagine being committed by a good-looking and diverse team of criminals cracking stilted jokes on, say, USA or TNT? No, there is not! And so it is with the "Sleeping Gas Bandits":

A city councilman and former mayor of Fort Bragg, California was gunned down while investigating a report of an illegal drug farm there. This won't help Mendocino County's reputation as among the mellowest of narco-hubs.

Street justice, extraordinary overkill edition: A boy throwing rocks at cars took a crossbow bolt to the belly yesterday, apparently as retribution for throwing a rock at a Toyota RAV4. The RAV4 had several passengers, one of whom literally went medieval on him, pulling out a crossbow and shooting the kid right then and there. Funny, I would have taken Goliath for more of a Chevrolet kind of guy.

The spectacularly stupid Ashley McDowell was approached by two men in a McDonald's parking lot where they offered to sell her an iPad for $300. She only had $180, but they gave it to her anyway. When she got home, she found out it was really just a block of wood with an Apple logo painted on the back.

Last summer, Fox News anchor Bill O'Reilly came to believe that his wife was romantically involved with another man. Not just any man, but a police detective in the Long Island community they call home. So O'Reilly did what any concerned husband would do: He pulled strings to get the police department's internal affairs unit to investigate one of their own for messing with the wrong man's lady.

In April 2008, an Austrian woman named Elisabeth Fritzl revealed to police that her father, Josef, had locked her in a basement for the preceding 24 years and raped her more than 3,000 times. Now comes yet another horrific case involving an Austrian man sexually abusing, torturing, and imprisoning his children over the course of many years.

Polygamist leader and chronically masturbating child rapist Warren Jeffs is "in a coma and may not survive" after a hunger strike, ABC News reports. The Texas Department of Criminal Justice said the leader is in "critical but stable condition." Jeffs is serving a life sentence for with no chance of parole for 45 years for the repeated rape of two teenage wives. [ABCNews, image via AP]

The man who used to run Google, Eric Schmidt, deleted almost every email immediately after reading it. His successor, Larry Page is an outspoken proponent of hoarding email. In whose inbox do you think the feds recently found incriminating evidence?