Are we going to take this lying down, San Francisco? See 20 seconds into the above TV spot.

Crazy cat lady and former Seventeen editor Atoosa Rubenstein's Alpha Kitty project seeks to empower young girls by showing them extremely poorly edited Youtube videos featuring women who tend to be more successful, better looking and wealthier than they are. A recent video featured "model/actress" Taylor Warren in front of a white background, musing: "I remember my mom catching me sitting in front of a mirror crying because I just wanted to know what I looked like doing it." But! Before you discard Ms. Rubenstein's idiotic project (and it is idiotic) I want to introduce you to Minnie Fay, a 17-year-old girl in Amston, CT who responds to nearly every Alpha Kitty video with a video post of her own. Fay is the sweetest, most vulnerable, most pure creature in all of Connecticut. She loves makeup but also kinda feels weird about it and she goes to school! And I love her. After the jump, meet her boyfriend, Rory, who is also an Alpha Kitty.

Even Earthly deity Oprah Winfrey, who's able to call up wild winds and volcanic eruptions by merely whispering instructions into her favorite Toywatch thing, isn't so jaded by supernatural acts that she can't be legitimately mindfreaked every now and again:

NBC and News Corp.'s joint Web-video venture Hulu remains in an invitation-only beta. But if you can't wait to access "Conan the Barbarian" online, blogger Matt Schlicht has your workaround. It's called OpenHulu. It's full of embedded Hulu videos like Arrested Development clip below. Other than whatever cash he's earning from Google ads he runs on the site, why's Schlicht taking so much time to index Hulu's content? "It's mainly the satisfaction of sticking it to the man and bending the rules," Schlict tells Last100. Sticking it to The Man by promoting his ad-supported content on your site and stirring up as much enthusiasm for his product as possible. Yeah! That'll teach him!

Video guy Nick McGlynn hung out this afternoon with the outraged Viacom contractors. (Freelancers? Permalancers? Slave labor?) Actual employees in the eyes of the law, probably, considering how one staffer described her freelance staff. "They're here everyday, these guys comes in Monday to Friday, Saturday, Sunday, weekends, holidays, everything, to work and make this channel run," she told us. Steady paychecks render such commitment completely obsolete—most fully employed people we know support a wide-ranging interpretation of the conventional five-day-workweek. Best slogan heard at the (first!) Viacom Networks Walkout Of 2007: "No one sucks dick for free." (Also great: "No pills, no 'Hills.'" Ha!) Damn straight—we don't even tongue-kiss for anything less than one employer-sponsored retirement plan and a reasonable deductible.

At the start of this video on the newly launched Big Think blog, Facebook investor Peter Thiel is utterly adorkable as he muses on the future. And then, all of a sudden, he gets heavy on us, predicting two or three decades of turmoil before we enter an age of incredible prosperity. Peter, dude, haven't you read "The Long Boom"? Prosperity now, turmoil later, please!

In a morning that's been filled with disappointment, incredible tragedy, and the setting of a citywide gloom unlikely to lift before the new year, we've barely resisting the urge to turn off the internets and crawl back into bed, waiting for someone to wake us around Groundhog Day. (Don't worry—an intern is on the way over to Defamer HQ with a Paxil-and-Grey Goose cocktail that should brighten up our moods considerably.)

Negotiations to end the Hollywood writers' strike over Internet pay collapsed Friday after studios refused to cave on "any proposal that uses distributor's gross as a basis for residuals," according to the AP. Whatevs. In bigger news, Jack Black and Tenacious D's latest work entered the canon of made-for-the-Internet protest videos, restoring the genre to its rightful place.

LXTV used to be a website. Now it's syndicating to NBC with the memorable title "LXTV 1st Look NYC." (Save the Bartender. Save the World). Uh. Anyway, for their first show they took viewers to a hot new club on 52nd Street. It's called Touch! The director of operations' name is Sauce! And Pedro Andrade, your host and Lance Bass' once and future lover, has come up with the worst sign off since Colin Quinn's "I'm Colin Quinn, that's my story and I'm sticking to it."

This clip about Facebook's controversial Beacon ads from the MTV-wannabe Fuse network doesn't tell you much new — but there's a great line at the end. The fact that it's become news on music-video channels tells you this: The bad buzz about Beacon has traveled much, much farther than the actual ads have.

Back in the '90s, Jim Plamondon used to push Windows on software developers. Now he's trying to stir up capital to back the Thummer, his venture into musical instruments. It's supposed to be easier to learn and more expressive due to Wii-like motion sensitivity. But so far, not so good. Plamondon's Wall Street Journal profile points out it's been nearly a half-century since the electric guitar took off. Before that, Adolphe Sax invented the saxophone for the French army in the 1840s.

Jim Goldman, CNBC's SIlicon Valley bureau chief, runs down everything we know about Google cofounder Larry Page's wedding today to Lucy Southworth. Yours truly makes a three-second appearance.

Down in Miami, Art Basel and its retinue of smaller art fairs are gradually destroying that city's sun-addled stale-air mind. Here in New York, however, it's just another reason to party. Gawker videographer Alex Goldberg (not the horrendously messed-up NoLIta child Alex Goldberg) was there to ask why the assembled art lovers had taken the time out of their busy schedules to attend a party called Bazel Shmazel.

If you can manage to get past the slow preamble to this interview on The View with Grace Is Gone star John Cusack (truth be told, we drifted off ourselves, but we're almost positive we heard Sherri Shepherd asking the actor how he manages to so accurately recreate his performances each and every time she plays one of his movies on her Jesus-powered DVD player), there's a small reward waiting for you at the end:

You might be surprised to learn that MySpace is bigger than Google. This, according to Barbara Walters, or at least the notes MySpace PR flack Dani Dudeck handed her before she interviewed Chris DeWolfe and Tom Anderson. Don't miss the tough questions like, "If I were a Martian. I come down from outer space. I hear about something called My Space. What is it?"

Nearly having had the Sex and the City movie ruined for us by the spoiler-riddled publicity photo New Line issued at the conclusion of the first day's shoot, we pledged to pay absolutely no attention to any coverage of the project until it reaches theaters next spring, hoping to preserve the many shoe-shopping, cougar-humping, and everyone-dies-old-and-alone surprises the SATC gang has in store for us.

Hollywood writers striking over Internet pay announced yesterday that talks had turned "substantive." And just in time too. Because wow has the quality of viral-video updates on the strike dropped off from the early days.