Media deep-throating sister site Gawker got their grubby paws on the cover of the Life & Style issue featuring the Holmes-parents-hate-heathen-daughtersnatcher-Cruise story we posted about earlier. We've already seen the pic circulating on the internets, but there's something about that first moment when you glimpse an Evil Bump at the ten-items-or-less line, nestled among the glossy scream headlines about Nicole Richie's efforts to finally get her skeleton on the outside of her body, that truly makes an improbable pregnancy of convenience feel real, you know?

Katie Holmes' Catholic family is predictably disturbed by their future son-in-law's surprise premarital implantation of the Miracle Baby in their daughter's womb. Also, they're none too thrilled about the whole swapping-Jesus-for-L.Ron-Hubbard thing:

Last night on The Late Show, actor Woody Harrelson admitted that he and his wife are expecting their third child, once again disproving the popular myths that regular exposure to THC or starring in Brett Ratner movies cause infertility: