Feminist icon Jane Fonda used the word "cunt" on the Today Show, rather than Oprah-approved vajayjay, and the moral guardians shuddered, but with less conviction than they once summoned. Swearwords found safety in numbers: John Edwards thinks Barack Obama is a "pussy"; and the likely Republican nominee, who survived years in a prisoner-of-war camp, is a "sissy", according to Salon. In preparation for a limp-wristed political future, 24 dumped its torture-loving creator. Sissy: not something one could say about Hayden Christensen, star of Doug Liman's new science-fiction movie, Jumper: he manfully squired co-star Rachel Bilson round Manhattan to establish his heterosexual credentials, but not so conclusively that female or gay fans would think him unavailable. (Amazingly, Madonna's new movie got better reviews.) Scarlett Johansson and Natalie Portman took the opposite tack, playing to male sapphic fantasies on the cover of W to promote their new movie, The Other Boleyn Sister. (We thought Scarjo looked more like a Slovak model.) Talking of pseudo-siblings, Julia Allison's 17-year-old "adopted" little sister, with whom the Star magazine talking head enjoyed posing, hooked up with Men's Vogue cad, Hud Morgan. There's a diagram. Even more complicated: the relationship between fashion designer Marc Jacobs, his boyfriend, and the gay porn star they've adopted. The New York Times adapted to these shallow times by splashing a game show, Deal or No Deal, across the front of its Arts section. But this belated populist appeal wasn't enough to staunch the loss of readers, and advertising: the Gray Lady is joining the Los Angeles Times and most every other newspaper in the US in cutting newsroom jobs. For these stories, and more, here's one page with the week's top stories. (Or just click on any of the names listed, above.)

Slate proudly announces that they're launching their most mindbogglingly pointless and stupid regular feature since Kausfiles (zing!): It's called "the unabridged Encyclopedia Baracktannica, a list of words that have been Obamafied by Slate." To "Obamafy" a word is to combine it with either the first or last name of Barack Obama, and then come up with some sort of vaguely joke-resembling definition. Like "Baracktail, an alcoholic beverage quaffed at an Obama campaign rally." Why? Why would anyone do this? Why is it a "widget"? Why does this exist? Did they think that just because they launched this at 7 p.m. last night no one would notice? There is already this and this, two sites with the benefit of being outright weird enough to actually amuse. But now there is Slate's Obama Word Generator, a thing that exists, and it is a widget, so we have embedded it below, Obamafter therack Jumpama.

Less than a week after columnist Maureen Dowd was accused of confusing a black reporter for Barack Obama's wife, the Times' "humor" blog wondered aloud whether presidential candidate Barack Obama and rocker Lenny Kravitz were "separated at birth." What? "Um, Barack looks more like Judy Garland than Lenny Kravitz," the Huffington Post wrote on its own humor-challenged humor site. Larger Times comparison picture after the jump, plus one involving a picture of Obama that's not 30 years old.

Barack swept the Potomac primaries! America's liberal again! We're all addicted to hope! So it's not all that surprising that Variety reports today that 24 co-creator and executive producer Joel Surnow has left the show. Insiders are crediting his departure to the exhausting amount of work required to mount a 24 episode real-time, action-packed television series, but we're wondering if there was maybe another, more political, more secret reason.

The Valley, despite the pretensions of some tech bloggers, has no influence on national politics. Candidates swing by, mutter "network neutrality" and other shibboleths, collect buckets of cash, and return to Washington richer but otherwise unchanged. This sad reality explains why we indulge ourselves in fantasies that we're run by aliens or robots. Those are politicians we could actually relate to. That's right: If Ron Paul supporters believed Obama was a Borg drone, they'd be more likely to vote for him.

"On top of it all, Mr. Obama beat out Bill Clinton for a Grammy, winning the spoken word award for the audio-book version of his memoir, 'The Audacity of Hope: Thoughts on Reclaiming the American Dream.'" [NYT]

Mitt Romney, my choice for president, "suspended" his campaign today. More disappointing? Dave Winer, who will never, ever let you forget his pioneering role in blogging, will continue to blather on about the election in his Twitter feed for months and months. Dude, we get it. You like Obama.

From Maureen Dowd's column yesterday: "Even though Obama stopped smoking when he started running for president, he has lost five pounds racing around the country. Just like Hollywood starlets, he works out religiously and he can make a three-course meal out of a Nicorette." We'd link, except that it's not in the online version. Weird!

The Obama Girl did not actually vote for Obama. Or at all! [NYT City Room]

Democratic primary

Barack Obama hit a wall with Latino and Asian voters last night, despite concerted efforts to court them and despite a surge of Obama support from whites. In California, his biggest loss of the night, white men overwhelmingly favored Obama over Clinton, according to exit polls, while Latinos voted against him 2:1 and Asians 3:1. In a state where Latinos and Asians were more than one-third of the voters, it was a tough blow, and one repeated in states like New Mexico and New York. It would be naive to blame minority-on-minority hate for all the Latino and Asian opposition to Barack Obama; after all, in California he ended up losing among whites, as well, thanks to strong Clinton support among women. But the stark political numbers make it much harder to deny the harsh reality and growing importance of anti-black racism among minorities, and should also be unsurprising to anyone who has closely followed American popular culture over the past two decades. Why we should have seen this coming, after the jump.

A young woman wept hysterical Tears of Change tonight during the endless speech of ecstasy by Barack Obama, the President of North Dakota, Utah and the Yukon Territory. Even crusty old Brit Hume at Fox News was touched, in the place where his soul used to be, and where he thought there was no hope. He saw, for the first time in forever, someone fervently "enchanted with" and "rhapsodic about" an American politician. Either that or a chance to make idealistic Democrats look crazy and emotional. Either way, it's true; the lady idolized Obama and really was losing her shit. After the jump, the footage as captured and enhanced by Gawker video bot Richard Blakeley .

"PAGO PAGO, American Samoa — Hillary Clinton has won the smallest contest of Super Tuesday, and she called the caucus to thank supporters." [Politico]

As usual, a Carroll Gardens elementary school bake sale (and Super Tuesday polling place!) accurately and succinctly sums up the important decision facing our nation today. Brownie or blondie? Choose wisely, America. [Wonkette]

Hopefully you haven't voted yet, because Hillary Clinton just picked up a key endorsement from rapper 50 Cent, who notes that not only does he think "she could do a good job" but also that she won't go down in a hail of gunfire, killed by some redneck with an assault weapon. Bill O'Reilly sagely notes how far fetched this scenario is.

"A thick cloud of marijuana smoke wafted through the air then and throughout the concert, and some fans engaged in free-style dance as though magically transported from 1968." [Reuters]

It's time for mockery, parody and remixing of "Yes We Can," the sappy, sweet and condescending Barack Obama music video, which has been out for like a whole two days, or roughly four YouTube Years. Sorry, there's nothing that can be done, it's just at that stage in the process. After the jump, talk show host and singer Tyra Banks, spliced in by television writer Jason Gelles, unwittingly lends much-needed levity to the Obama mash-up.

"Web 2.0 has already decided that if you don't vote for Obama they'll all unfriend you." — commenter zerogee on the prevailing winds South of Market Street.

Fundrace's database of political contributions says less about political affiliation than it does about the distribution of wealth in New York. The heaviest concentrations of donors are on the Upper East Side, the Upper West Side, and Wall Street. (Many executives give their work addresses when making political contributions.) But note a few neighborhood variations. Democratic candidates such as Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama garner support from gayish neighborhoods such as Chelsea and the West Village, and bohemian-bourgeois Park Slope, in Brooklyn. It's a pity that Fundrace doesn't allow a search by candidate: Obama's Brooklyn support must be much more evident than Hillary's. Here's a bet: if Obama loses New York, we'll hear how the endorsements of the cultural elite, and the bohemian vote, actually cost him the election. (Click the thumb for detail of the map.)