The kids from The City went to another city, Miami, and went club bumpin' and desperately tried not to cheat on each other for five minutes. They were sort of unsuccessful!

Whitney was helped into her crate and checked in at the desk and then Erin and Jay and Male Model picked her up once they'd landed in Florida. She was tired and dazed and had to pee, but after she had some water and ran around the block a few times, she was ready to go! Meanwhile Male Model had gone into the unisex bathroom at a Popeye's with an employee for a quickie. As he was leaving, he shoved his crotch into a patron's face and then made finger diddling motions to an old lady. He can't control himself!!

When they got to their hotel and Male Model finished servicing the front desk agent, Connie Lingus, everyone decided to strip down to their tawny haunches and head out to the pool that's by the the beach. The girls sat in a little towel circle and talked about who boys are and why they are boys and do you think they can throw their dingles over their shoulders, like continental soldiers. Meanwhile the boys talked about those other girls over there and then tried to take their doodles and tie 'em in a knot, then tie 'em in a bow. Male Model was dingling his doodle as he lustily scoured the poolside for another available romp. He settled on a hotel maid, named Yolanda, whose sister works for a big socialite in New York City.

After lounging around and drinking by the pool by the beach, they got bored of that and decided to lounge around and drink at the club by the beach. So they went to some place called Liv (owned by Olivia Palermo perhaps?) that had a laser light show and Jay, who's such a phony—what "downtown" smooth-groove rockabilly wants to go to a techno house club in Miami Beach? Fake male model ones, that's who—ran into an ex-girlfriend, who just happened to be at the very same club! Such acts of kismet on this show. So he of course went over and they chatted about why they broke up and whether or not Jay's noodle hangs low. Whitney got all cow-eyed and peculiar about it, but then the cameras shifted over to Male Model.

He was engaged in what could only be called a 9-girl-suck-n'-fuck in the middle of the dance floor. Not quite sure if it counted, Erin tentatively dialed Girl Model on the phone as she promised she would if Male Model displayed any sort of sexual chicanery. Back in New York on a sexy photo shoot, Girl Model looked sad as she asked "Nine girl? Sucking and fucking? Sigh. Well, let me know if anything bad happens." Then she went back to writhing on a bed with her colleague, a chiseled-faced "gentleman" called Sergeant Squarehole.

Then Jay's ex-girlfriend trundled up and slur-yelled an apology in Whitney's general direction while Whitney nodded gravely. Then she reached into her purse, pulled out a large revolver, and shot the ex-girlfriend dead, right there at the club. Erin said "I think we should go..." so Whitney turned and shot her. Then she walked over to Male Model, who was busy fathering his 12 illegitimate children on the dance floor, and she gave him two slugs in the back. Then she calmly put the revolver back in her purse and walked out into the dizzy Miami night.

Back in the actual world, Whitney was still nodding gravely at the gurgling ex-girlfriend. When it looked like the apology tone poem had ended, Whitney just said "That's OK" and then Jay came up and was all "Nothing happened with that girl, I'm 'downtown', I'm a musician" and Whitney tried to say something like "thou doth protest too much" but instead she said "hambone chicken feet everything's OK forget it." So they left the club and they left Miami and headed back to bitter cold New York.

Back in Crapsburg, Girl Model had been so upset with Male Model growing old and dying together with all those floozies at the club that she decided to have a drink with Sergeant Squarehole. We don't know exactly what happened on that datelet, but she did wear an enormous fur coat and look kind of fabulous. So there's that. When Male Model got back in town, they had a sad little dinner together and he brought her flowers and they called each other honey and baby and then she cried and said that they should not live together. Male Model put on his best dumb sadboy pout that his mama taught him and slowly wet his pants. So the Model couple may be headed for the skids, which would be too bad, because I'm curious to see what their strange, sharp-faced offspring would look like as they teetered around in fur coats and made love to strangers on the sidewalk. Ah well.

Back at Whitney's Cloud Palace, she and Jay got to talking about the ex-girlfriend thing again. They locked arms at the elbows and did several Do-Si-Dos around the stark white living room, accomplishing nothing. "This conversation makes me feel nauseous," Whitney moaned. Probably from all the spinning. So they stared at each other and then Whitney turned and gazed longingly and dangerously at the box on her mantle which holds a big, shiny revolver. Someday, she thought. Someday...

Erin had lunch with another mousy brown haired girl with bangs and they talked about absolutely nothing and I'm not sure if we're still supposed to care.

Olivia, sadly, was not in this episode. Though I did hear from a source that their adventure may pop up in this season's DVD special features. Basically what happened was that Cousin Jub-Jub called, all static and scratch on a bad connection. But she made out the word "treasure" and "small island," so she chartered a puddle jumper and fly around the Caribbean, hoping to find him. Eventually she spotted his sea lion-esque silhouette flopped onto a tiny desert island. After landing, she sloshed through the surf and up unto the beach. "Jub-Jub! Jub-Jub!" she cried, trying to shake him awake. "Wake up Jub-Jub, it's Liv. Liv's here now. I brought you money, and my apartment keys." Those words instantly roused him, like smelling salts. "Oh Jub-Jub, you're back. Now what's this about treasure?" But Cousin Jub-Jub couldn't remember. He supposed he was just drunk and playing one of his funny, farty pranks. Olivia sighed but, oh, she couldn't stay mad at his beautiful, mutton-filled face. So they hopped back onto the plane, and headed back North. Olivia gazed out the window and thought bitchy thoughts, while Jub-Jub smiled strangely. Then the camera panned down to show the edges of some sparkly gold doubloons, just barely poking out of his pockets.

THAT'S IT!