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Sure, we brought you the up-to-the-minute, fully adequite Lindsay Lohan manifestos and Britney Spears cooch-flashing updates, but sometimes it takes a little perspective—like Al Gore showing an auditorium of Chinese meteorology students a slide of spaceship Earth—for us to really appreciate just how far we've come, and how precious our Hollywood ecosystem is. Therefore, in an attempt at making some sense of it all, we present Defamer's Year In Review:
January
 · Viacom and CBS go their separate ways, and the golden era of Paramount lot CBS staffer slights is born.
· Remember when Lindsay Lohan still had an "asthma card" to play?
· Angelina Jolie reveals she is heavy with Chosen Child.
· James Frey sits upon a throne of memoirist lies.
· Chad Lowe gets Swank'd.
· Lionsgate starts plotting their Crash Oscars overthrow.
· The Golden Globes tell us all we need to know about where Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe are headed.
· Leif Garrett and Brad Renfro face the music.
· The Colin Farrell sex tape transcripts still crack us up.
· The CW is announced, still seems like a good idea.
· The only thing anyone remembers about Sundance starred Kettle One and strawberries.

February
 · Brokeback Mountain and Oscar seem like a definite couple, but you know how that goes.
· Lee Tamahori: DGA member looks like a lady!
· Britney Spears was supposed to be the next Debra Messing.
· Werner Herzog is Joaquin Phoenix's guardian angel. (Yeah, we thought we had dreamed that one, too.)
· Tom Ford gives us a naked Scarlett Johansson, and yet no cleavage. Explain that one!
· New Line online marketing gives us a virtual Vera Farmiga, then invites you to eat her out until she "[COMES] her fucking brains out!"
· The Stacy Snider defection rumors swirl.
· Overdosing on Oscars hype.
· The split that never came gets the legal threats that never materialize.
· Jeremy Piven is crowned King of L.A. Nightlife. As if we needed Los Angeles magazine to tell us that.