We're not sure if you noticed, but right now Gawker resembles a large load of snail dung: shitty (more so than usual!) and slow-moving. Unfortunately, we're suffering from some technical difficulties, which may or may not have to do with a plastic cup of Natty Light and one of our servers.

We're sorry for the inconvenience; we're posting when we can. It pains us to know that instead you might consider doing actual work today, but we beg you to remain strong and unproductive in the face of crisis.