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Something is very, very wrong when a movie (possible SPOILER ALERT: Bobcat Goldthwait's Stay) that involves a woman admitting that she'd blown a dog doesn't have a prayer to win the Sundance Special Jury Prize for the Heroic Depiction Of Deviant Sex Acts. Destricted, a "spicy compilation of shorts by visual artists who are reinvigorating erotic film" by Gaspar "Irreversible" Noe, Larry "Kids" Clarke, and Matthew "Cremaster" Barney, already has the competition locked up. What could be worse than the discussion of canine fellatio, you ask? The graphic depiction of bulldozer fucking, we answer. We found ourselves standing in the parking lot of the Library Theater as the movie's premiere was letting out, watching people's stunned faces and hearing some muttered reviews as they filed out ("Oh, that was horrible..." and "I feel totally provoked."), but someone we knew coming out of the screening treated us to a pretty thorough description of the dozer-humping action. And all we haven't erased from our memory banks in the interest of psychological self-preservation was his fear that during the intercourse, the actor's "dick might get ripped off." As the kids are fond of saying, good times.

Later, we heard a story from someone with knowledge of the bulldozer short's production that the original actor (he was replaced, the tipster thought) had some problems getting aroused when faced with several tons of unsurprisingly unappealing earth-mover, so a fluffer was employed to help him get ready for his gear-schtupping scene. We suppose that coaching him to close his eyes and imagine he was nailing a forklift wouldn't have gotten the job done.