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Now, it's your duty to make sure that these nubby-fingered slaves did design your shirt in vain. And be sure to place your final orders today because unless you do it RIGHT NOW and choose 2nd-day air, these snazzy cotton fuckers will NOT be delivered before Christmas. You know there's only about $29 left on your credit card anyway, so use the rest of it to outfit a sleazy co-worker, scrawny ex-boyfriend, or Real Doll in one of these. And for those heathens out there who have no intentions of getting anyone a gift, you can always just buy one for your own damn selves.

Printed on fine American Apparel cotton, we can't think of a better way to cover your perky nips as they wither from the cold of your transit strike walk.

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