Star Jones Writes Her Own Bible

The new year is rapidly approaching, and oh, what wondrous things it will bring! Like Star Jones's new book, Shine: A Physical, Emotional, and Spiritual Journey to Finding Love. Just thinking about it makes us need to change our underwear. From the publisher's description:
It all began when Star took a close look at herself and her life and realized she wasn't happy with what she saw: obesity precluded her from crossing her legs, she needed an asthma inhaler, she couldn't fasten her own necklace, and, worst of all, she got too tired to shop — a disaster because Star Jones Reynolds is a seriously committed shopper.
Oh, come on. Did she really need to take a close look at herself to realize this problem?