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After months of silence, attack survivor Oprah Winfrey went on Good Morning America and bravely relived the harrowing events of May 23rd, in which "lovestruck" actor Tom Cruise wrestled Winfrey to the ground, then repeatedly brutalized her couch as the terrified host looked on helplessly:

"It was wilder than it was appearing to me," Winfrey said. "I was just trying to maintain the truth for myself because I couldn't figure out what was going on. And what I was prepared for was the dance that happens when you're doing celebrities — when you know they're not going to tell you, but you're going to ask anyway, and then you try asking another way."


Instead of the "dance," Winfrey was confronted with an Irish jig on top of her furniture.

"I was not buying — not buying or not buying," Winfrey said of Cruise's declarations of love. "That's why I kept saying to 'you're gone, you're really gone.'"

A tearful Winfrey admitted that she developed a severe case of echolalia after the incident, but defiantly maintained that she will not succumb to the culture of victimhood. The day after the incident, she enrolled herself and the traumatized sofa in Krav Maga classes, vowing to be prepared should a crazed Cruise return to finish the job after the birth of his baby.