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Fox hasn't even pried Gail Berman's nameplate off her office door and already the network is falling apart. Last night, American Idol aired on the east coast with the wrong telephone numbers for three of the contestants, leading to a voting snafu unprecedented in the history of this country. Imagine a world in which a vote for precocious Mikalah Gordon is misdirected to boy-band/My Boy Sherman wannabe Anthony Federov? We know, right? Fox's plans for a re-vote during tonight's show and to push back the elimination show until Thursday just aren't going to cut it; a mass suicide is the only acceptable corrective. You go first, and we'll meet everybody in hell—where, of course, we'll be serenaded for eternity by the infernal chorus of William Hung and Clay Aiken.