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· Lindsay Lohan, more than a little defensive: "AP: What is with people's obsession with your breasts? Lohan: God. I don't know. They're real though." Make sure you read the whole exchange, it's chock full of some real howlers.
· RIP Dimebag Darrell, nee Diamond Darrell. May you shred in Heaven, sweet cowboy from Hell.
· Tara Reid tears at her clothing and cries to the heavens, futilely begging for some relief from her crushing fame: "[The tabloids] will write anything they can and always in a derogatory way. You can't do anything about it." [second item]
· "This time, a sobbing Spears had to be carried out of the Hard Rock Hotel and ended up getting sick in the parking lot."